Neil Strauss, the New York Times bestselling author of The Game, presents Rules of the Game:
I. The Stylelife Challenge Master the Game in 30 Days
II. The Style Diaries The Pickup Artist's Companion
Questions for Neil Strauss
Amazon.com: Yours has to be one of the strangest career paths in the book business: from rock critic at the New York Times, to cowriter of memoirs with rockers and porn stars, to bestselling seduction guru. Do you ever wonder how you got from point A to point Z?
Strauss: Oddly, I never do. Instead, I wonder why it took me so long to get to point Z. And then I wonder if people are going to stick with me when I go to point whatever-is-after-Z next. I guess that would be point AA--which, come to think of it, I've already been to with Dave Navarro while writing his book.
Amazon.com: You write in the introduction to Rules of the Game that you thought The Game was your "last word on the subject," and you were ready to get on with your life. But, like Michael Corleone, you got pulled back in. Why was it so hard to leave?
Strauss: Good simile. Someone else compared it to Donnie Brasco. There's something about the seduction community that sucks people in. I've seen college kids drop out of school; doctors quit their jobs; and celebrities take huge career risks to pursue this knowledge.
It may be because, according to the Kinsey Institute, most men think about sex every two minutes. But our society has never given them tools to safely fulfill these desires. Once they find out there's a way to learn to be more successful with women--and see evidence that it works--they tend to dive in headfirst. Perhaps because, when it comes down to it, this is why we're really here.
Amazon.com: Do you meet women who have read The Game? What do they think? And with the thousands of people out there you have trained and the many more thousands who have read the book, are women starting to recognize the strategies? Do they ever say, "Hey, you're playing the Game on me"?
Strauss: I've run into some women who've read the book to learn about the male mind, and they've all been positive about it--the book, that is, not the male mind. It's the women who've heard of the book but haven't read it who want to burn it.
And actually, a guy at a book signing the other day told me he got caught using one of the openers. But he still walked away with her phone number. His advice: on the rare chance that it happens, don't get scared and scamper off. Instead, use it as an opportunity to start a conversation about the game itself and whether it works. If they've read the book, this obviously means they're interested in the subject--and now you both have something in common.
Amazon.com:Rules of the Game is actually two books: the Stylelife Challenge and the Style Diaries. The first book is pretty straightforward: a 30-day plan for "Mastering the Game." But the second one is not what you'd expect in a self-help book. Can you explain what it is and why you included it?
Strauss: I didn't want to just give people a self-help book, and promise that their life will be sunshine and unicorns forever. I wanted them to know that with knowledge and power come a new set of challenges and problems. So the black book contains seduction stories from the dark side of the game, and the fact that, as the German director Fassbinder put it, "We were born to need each other, but we still haven't learned how to live with each other."
Amazon.com: Part of the story of The Game was the tension of what happens, after you've become proficient at the Game, when you find someone you love. Is that the point: to go from player to lover (or, ulp, husband!)? How do you do that? Or does playing the Game become its own end for some people?
Strauss: If you master the game, then you also must master your own fears and insecurities. And overcoming these destructive traits can only help you have healthier relationships. That said, the downside to learning the game and then falling in love is that you have to be strong, because there are a lot more options than there once were. So for readers who are having trouble: the secret to monogamy is realizing that the fantasy of being with someone else is usually better than the reality. You can't do better than love.
If you want to play the Game, you've got to know the Rules.
In his international bestseller The Game, Neil Strauss delved into the secret world of pick-up artists--men who have created a science out of the art of seduction. Not only did he reveal the techniques that they had developed, but he became a master of The Game, and the world's No. 1 PUA, as Style.
Now, in his first follow-up to The Game, comes an extraordinary package: A lavishly produced, two-volume pocket-size set that every pickup artist--accomplished or aspiring--will need to have. The first book, The Stylelife Challenge, is the manual Strauss thought he'd never write: the ultimate guide to landing the woman of your dreams. Bound in white leatherette, it offers an in-depth 30-day program, Strauss challenges readers to confront their insecurities and overcome them through a process of rigorous self-examination, briefings and field missions.
In the second book, Strauss takes readers into the dark side of The Game. Bound in black leatherette, The Style Diaries offers a series of tales of seduction and sexual (mis)adventure. From accidentally getting married during a drunken night in Reykjavik, to luring a famous musician's granddaughter into a threesome; from conducting a keenly felt and tender relationship over email, to the stress and frustration of the torturous and highly unorthodox "30 Day Sex Experiment," The Style Diaries takes you further into the seduction underworld than ever before, and delves where The Game never dared to tread: into the even more complicated rules of relationships.
The perfect first steps This book is about much more than just meeting and having sex with beautiful women. (Although, that is the primary motivation for guys to learn this stuff.) That is the biggest difference between Style's material and all the other master's stuff. Neil is teaching you to become a confident, socially adept person, not just a pickup machine.
I started getting into the game a couple years ago when I started listening to David DeAngelo (also very focused on helping people become a better person, but still focused very heavily on the dating aspect) and he really opened my eyes to what I was doing wrong. Then I happened to come across this guy called Mystery and the stuff he was doing just blew David D out of the water as far as going out and picking up girls. This was what he was all about and he did it like that was his calling in life. The stuff Mystery pulls off would impress anyone. Eventually, I heard about the game and picked it up. It is a great history of the pick up community and of how Neil became Style and surpassed Mystery as a pick up artist.
This book seems to me to be a look back to when Neil was just starting out and what he wishes he had, had before he went to that first field boot camp with Mystery. It contains the steps needed to learn this stuff without having a baptism by fire and also warns of the dark side of getting good with this material.
Right now I'm on day 3 of the Stylelife Challenge and a member of Style's academy (Stylelife.com) and even though I have met the goals of the challenge (get a date) several times since starting to read this, I still believe it will help me become a more socially adept person.
I would recommend to anyone starting out on this path to read "Rules of the Game" first then "The Game".
Following that I would suggest (as one possible path):
Mystery Method (Can be bought on amazon)
Any of David D's material (Very good foundation material)
From there I would suggest branching out and learning social skills:
Body Language (The Definitive Book of Body Language)
Story Telling (Lots of good books)
Conversation (Again lots of books)
Fitness (You need to take care of yourself)
Basic Fashion/Style (Details Men's Style Manual: The Ultimate Guide for Making Your Clothes Work for You)
More advanced material (Mystery Learned much of what he knows from these two books, I believe)
The Art of Seduction
The 48 Laws of Power
Lastly, take a look at this material from a female perspective
Why Men Love Bitches
Don't waste your money! This is just a compilation of material that was already available for free online. There is nothing in this book you couldn't find, by doing a search online. Neil Strauss has completely sold out. I wouldn't recommend any of his products. The game was a good book, this is just filler material....more info
Nice start.. I think it's a great starting point for those who have no pua experience whatsoever. It's basically a guide to helping you aquire a stranger's phone number within the time frame of 30 days through completing various tasks that are designed to help your speaking ability and strengthen your self-confidence. I've only gone afew pages into it and already found myself having fun, learning new things, and doing things i would've never thought of on my own to re-establish myself as a "ladies' man"....more info
Not your best work Neil Unlike "The Game" I found this book a lot harder to read. It seems to be a book for gentlemen who have never even really approached a woman before. A lot of the missions are not realistic and I dont see myself doing many of them to fine tune the "skills" that are in the book. If you are socially awkward and looking to change your ways and talk to more women then this is the book for you. If not I find the material online, the newsletters, and audio files to be a lot more helpful.
The book takes you through a 30 day period where you must complete several tasks in order to learn "The Game". Since it didnt really pull me in it took me longer than 30 days to read because I wasnt that excited to pick it up and read it everyday.
If you are a huge fan of Neil buy it, if not borrow it from a friend when they are done with it....more info
Rules of the game Well, I ordered the "Rules of game" after reading reviews written by others who own the book. I ordered the book and it came within a week, thanks Amazon. Anyway, the book comes in a set of two. The first book you are supposed to read and follow each of the chapter's instructions each day for 30 days. Then at the end of the 30 days, you should "have game." Well, for me I purchased the book to "fine tune" my game so any little bit helps. It does have some good ideas, such as confidence building exercises and instructions on how to walk up to a woman who is in a crowd of people. So, if you are looking for a book that will help you with your game, this book might help but you will have to have at least a minimum level of self confidence to even attempt some of the ideas this book puts out. I chose not to follow the 30 day test but to read it and pull out what I needed to help me fine tune my flow. I've only had the book for a few days so I can't comment on how it turns out but just know, Neosoul will do his thang! YMMV. Neosoul06 ...more info
A Model for Self-Help Books Although I enjoyed the Stlyleife Diaries, what was truly worth the money was the Stylelife challenge.
Why do all self help books always give you philosophical advice with no practical ways of incorporating it into your life?
This guide truly changed my dating life. It gives just enough theory while encouraging you to practice every day. It also doesn't allow you to skip ahead so you can learn in small chunks.
What keeps it from 5 stars is the fact that Neil essentially advertises his dating academy throughout the book which I thought ate into his integrity a bit.
Any man looking to improve his dating life should buy this ASAP....more info
Incorrect Item I'm not sure whose fault it was but this is not the item I expected. ...more info
Good companion how-to guide If you want to take a step-by-step approach to improve your game and attract more women, this is the book for you. While The Game was a narrative of Neil's life, this is the nuts and bolts on how you can do the same.
Detracted a star not for the content, but for the tiny little books themselves. They are in the size of a small children's book, but have very small type. Not sure if this was to make the set look bigger, but it would have been better had they just printed in a normal size with normal sized-text.
There are two books in the set, one is a day by day approach to improving your game and the other are stories from PUAs in training. Their "war stories" if you will. The stories are more interesting, but the how-to book is more useful. I'm still working along the many, many tasks and homework, but I'm enjoying the process and can tell a difference in my success rate. That's the whole point, isn't it?
Of all the how-to seduction guides, I can only recommend this book and Secrets of the A Game: How to Meet and Attract Women Anywhere, Anyplace, Anytime. Both are simple, straightforward approached to learning how to meet more women and creating attraction.
A manual for a relationship I have to be honest. I've read the book, I've understood the concept, but I'm still single. Not because the book doesn't work, but I know the end result SOLELY depends on myself. So I dare to say, Neil has given me the knowledge and wisdom on relationship through this book, but it ALL depends on you. People who gave this book less than 4 starts are probably fail to understand the concept and its applications. There are so many living proofs from his students. Congratulations Neil, you've changed the world to the better. Thumbs up big time!...more info
Useful, Cogent, Well Written As with Mystery's book, this one is a primer on persuasion and negotiation. Strauss covers in rapid fire fashion some well established ground: show value; don't be needy; exude confidence, But he also instructs on some new areas: learn the power of a story(two minutes tops, hone it down and practice off hand delivery); understand reframing( you are not an engineer, you are designing the next generation of cell phone); do not take a "no" as rejection but as an opportunity to learn and re-tool. Plenty of useful advice(the one on knowing when to get a number and how shows real insight in how to ask for what you want in any situation). The essay book has good stuff in it but is uneven. The book print is small so get a powerful reading lamp or a nice sunny day in the park. ...more info
Its GRRRRRRRRRREAT!! Another great book if you've read The Game. The black book is a compilation of stories by Style that have taken place after The Game and the white book (even though i havent read it yet) appears to be much like Mystery Method by Mystery but alittle more like a workbook than just a text book of the subject. Great buy and great reads....more info
High quality production but a little thin. High quality production but a little thin. The Diaries were entertaining and well written and I did draw some knowledge from them. The Challenge book may be just what I need to get my AFC self back in the game again --the pocket size format of this book means I can have it with me at all times....more info
Compelling Sequel by the PUA Master Just when you thought all the PUA stories were told, Neil cranks out another soon to be bestseller. A fascinating sequel to Strauss's groundbreaking pick up artist classic with a twist. The void of male social dynamics and pick up advice with substance is masterfully filled with the entry of Rules of the Game. His techniques are compelling, and his tales are infectious page turners.
This slickly packaged title is a two volume set. Its focus begins with establishing your identity, expectations and desires to better concentrate your efforts on your relationship goals. It dissects the psychology of female expectations, and lays out in classroom format the smooth adaptable skills that satisfy their wants and needs to create physical and an emotional connection.
Part one -the Stylelife Challenge is a 30 day instructional mental-workout program; the HOW TO for improving your social marketing; perfecting your personality, body language and image, creating sexual chemistry and attraction; virtually 100s of tips, exercises, and techniques, logically explained step by step.
What I really liked is he explains exactly how and why each facet of your studies works, and assigns you homework. You're forced to do somewhat uncomfortable things until you become a natural through repetition; till each skill is performed effortlessly. Each chapter builds and expands on the previous. After learning all 30 you've got the mindset and confidence to have Game.
Part 2 - The Style Diaries: fascinating to unusual stories from the trenches that focus on the unexpected bad results that occur due to bad decisions in the middle of encounters. It's the HOW NOT TO game women. As always, Neil's infamous story telling of underworld situations are riveting and bizarre, from conquests to hilarious train wrecks. Edge of your seat field reports brilliantly written. He hangs with the who's who of Rock Stars and travels the globe, injecting himself in situations most of us can only dream of. The conquests could be penned in a braggadocio style, but his writing is self-deprecating and fun; he's learning and laughing along with us. A contagious writing style.
Rules of the Game is a very unique concept, and needed to be written. The first title simply left too many men desiring all the PUA tools Style used in the previous title. It's an advanced classroom explaining how he learned to execute all the killer pulls of hot women in the Game. If you're reading this, you've probably already read Mystery's manual. I'd also highly suggest for deeper PUA psychology and a million laughs another bestseller in this genre you'll see mentioned above.
The Professional Bachelor Dating Guide - How to Exploit Her Inner Psycho...more info
Go watch the movie..."Ground Hog Day"... In the movie Ground Hog Day, Bill Murray cannot seduce the woman of his dreams until he eventually just forgets the woman and works on creating a better Bill Murray.
The best way to attract is to actually be attractive.
Strauss teaches that being attractive deals with who you are and what you are doing on the planet (not just with your attire and body shape). Surprisingly, much of the point of one of these two books is simply about how to create a better self (not so much about crazy sexual adventure). Here you will find a step-by-step improvement plan that includes details of grooming, presence, speech, goal development, and social interactions.
It can be a handicapp to be honest and loving but be seen as cold and manipulative. Seduction techniques can actually help an honest person avoid being misinterpreted.
If you are already successful in the social and business world, most of this will be review. But, you may find a few blind spots if you breeze through the plan.
Though the game of seduction can be cruel and manipulative and used for ill means. Like any powerful tool, it can be used for good as well. In the best use, seduction means being deliciously attractive in who you are and what you are about. Christ was seductive in this sense; attractive in love and power to the point that people were happier for giving up everything to follow him around.
I have a 16-year-old son. The 30 day plan offers him good starting strategies for developing social and business skill. But, the detailed advice should be valuable for most men and women of any age.
A good, thorough guide for all guys. This "rules" book pretty much covers all you need to know about how to play the game of love. Lots of good, solid advice and lots of advice that makes complete and total sense. Mr. Strauss has gone it again. Highly recommended, along with The Exclusive Layguide: When Dating and Having Sex with Incredibly Hot Women is No Longer Mirage Even If You Don't Look Like a Model or Don't Make a Fortune...more info
Good self help I think it has some good self help info - not just for meeting chicks but also for meeting people in any social situation. I heard him on the Michael Smerconish show in Philadelphia and it seemed like an interesting book - it was! ...more info
Women will also find The Rules of the Game fascinating and up-front honest Rules of the Game is a two-book boxed set by author and playboy extraordinaire Neil Strauss. One paperback, "The Style Diaries", is a reminiscence of how Neil Strauss turned around his sex life and taught himself to be attractive to women; the other paperback, "The Stylelife Challenge", is a step-by-step instruction manual for men seeking to engineer a similar turnaround in their own life. The Style Diaries reads very much like a steamy letter column in a men's entertainment magazine (to put it politely)... but when not describing the author's raunchy sexual escapades, The Style Diaries cuts to the heart of the attractions between men and women. Especially of note is the author's hard-learned lesson that making the successful transition from sexual flings to a long-term relationship/marriage requires more than merely staying monogamous - a steady relationship needs at least as much energy and drive applied to its maintenance as the sexual career of a playboy does. Unlike The Style Diaries, The Stylelife Challenge isn't meant to be read cover to cover in one sitting - each of its thirty chapters contains an exercise or activity that the reader is meant to practice and internalize in order to gradually learn how to become more attractive to the opposite sex, with the goal of getting a date within a month (a date is defined as a planned second encounter with a woman, even if it's just arranging to get a cup of coffee together). Covering everything from improving one's grooming, to reading a woman's body language to tell whether she's interested or not, to learning how to send subtle verbal or nonverbal cues that she won't have to beat you off with a stick if she's not interested and much more, The Stylelife Challenge is enthusiastically recommended for any man preparing to enter the dating world, and especially for shy men, 40-year-old virgins, widowers, and the newly divorced. Women will also find The Rules of the Game fascinating and up-front honest; there are plenty of insights into human nature and other tidbits of wisdom that adults of both genders and all sexual orientations should know....more info
Good Read If you like his first book "The Game", you will like this one as well....more info
Great The other books and online resources gives me a lot of information on seduction and picking up women, and I go into information overload when I try to approach women. I find that I get thousands of thoughts on how I should act running through my head instead of relaxing and paying attention to what she is saying.
This book encourages me to master the art of seduction one step at a time with the 30 days challenge, instead of trying to do everything at the same time. Right now, I have improved my posture, voice, looks, and I have just conquered my fear of opening women. I'm at the part where I'm suppose to tease 3 different women. I definetely recommend this book to beginners.
I don't know how much of the black book is true...more info
The Game - bette than expected! I thought this was going to be a how-to book with some stories inter-weaved. Well, it's written much better than that! It's more like Neil Strauss' story (learning how to pick up women; going from just being an observer to being, not just a participant, but a leader in that community) with the how-to's built in. I think a lot of guys can relate to his story. He really bares it all and doesn't pull any punches. I've always wanted to write a book about my life (about mostly being single and trying to figure it all out on my own) but he (and Mystery) beat me to it. Damn you guys!...more info
Entertaining and insightful This was my first trip through a Neil Strauss novel and I have to say, it was a great read. The Style Diaries is a tale of his exploits and dealings with women, largely during his years spent emersed in the world of professional pick-up artists.
There is a passage at the very beginning of the book that states, "these pages are not meant as prescription, but as prevention". After reading the book, it's easy to see why. I won't ruin any of the book for you. It's a very short read that will keep your interest to the end, but the moral of the story was... unexpected and pleasantly surprising. If you've ever asked yourself, "am I missing out on this exciting lifestyle of the pick-up artist?", you should read this book....more info
Great book What more can I say. Love the community, and this book is a great support and follow up of "The Game". Step by step for beginners and quite a few tips and refresments for the more advanced gamers....more info
Ok Well it was ok. I think it is meant to be more for guys who want to be pick up artists or players. I just want to overcome my fears of meeting women and meet the kind of woman I like.
I found it interesting, but for my purposes David Deangelo Approaching Women and Starting Conversations DVD Program by David DeAngelo and Mr L. Rx's books worked better. With Mr. L. Rx's book being the best.Dating To Relating - From A To Z: (A Man's Guide To Understanding Women)
Adventures in seduction The Stylelife Diaries, the black book, is so far my favorite pick-up related book. I'm glad that someone finally showed that you don't just get good or bad results from pick-up, sometimes you get unpredictable and amazing results. Its not just about getting the girl or not getting the girl, its about the experience and the adventure. After reading The Game, I thought Neil would be someone good to learn from and someone useful to hang out with simply because you would have more girls in and around your life as a result. The Stylelife Diaries convinced me that Neil would probably be someone fun to hang out with, regardless of the women. He has an appreciation for adventure and ridiculousness that I didn't see coming. This was probably the funniest nonfiction book I have ever read. If you enjoyed The Stylelife Diaries, read Booty Nomad, by Scott Mebus. Both of these books are about women, adventures, and will make you laugh out loud in public places....more info
Much less data than I expected. I thought these books were going to be the size of the first book. Wrong. They are pocket-book size. So don't think you will have near the same amount to read as in the first book. These are about the size of a large postcard.
Love Neil Strauss, yet not this book I'm a massive fan of Neils. I rate his book on Motley Crue, The Game and Dave Navarro in my top ten of all time.
Yet I'm not into this book. Actually after I read it. I just gave it to a friend.
It's okay if you are a beginner. Yet if you have been tranformed by the game when it was released in 2005. You might be looking for more of an advanced manual. I didn't think this was it. Very much for the newbie. Which is cool. Yet I'm not a beginner.
Not "The Game" but still great I bought this together with Exercising the Penis when I broke up with my girlfriend last month. Both books were five stars. I was looking to improve myself in a few key areas after being out of the "game" for more than for years.
I, like many, read The Game when it first came out. I, also like many, enjoyed the first one better than this one. But a lot of people are failing to realize that this book is a much different book than The Game. It's mainly a HOW-TO book. The Rules of the Game is unique compared to all of strauss' other books. Of course the narratives are going to be better. This book isn't designed to make you laugh, it's designed to teach you about style's version of seduction.
All in all, I enjoyed Rules of the Game. I like how the book is laid out in a day-to-day format, so you take only one baby step at a time. I've skipped several missions, but I've already found myself interacting with women (and even men) much better. I also enjoyed the Stylelife Diaries. It was kind of short and repetitive (several threesome stories), but I couldn't put it down once I started reading it....more info
Great guide to pick up girls This book has not only helped me to be more successful with women, but also be influential at professional level, and has given me more confidence....more info
the game dis book here gives you the game. if u lookin for a good book to help u git women, look no further...more info