|On Becoming Baby Wise: Giving Your Infant the Gift of Nighttime Sleep (On Becoming. . .)
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The infant management concepts presented in this book have found favor with over two million parents and twice as many contented babies. On Becoming Babywise brings hope to the tired and bewildered parents looking for an alternative to sleepless nights and fussy babies. The Babywise Parent Directed Feeding concept has enough structure to bring security and order to your baby's world, yet enough flexibility to give mom freedom to respond to any need at any time. It teaches parents how to lovingly guide their baby's day rather than be guided or enslaved to the infant's unknown needs. The information contained within On Becoming Babywise is loaded with success. Comprehensive breast-feeding follow-up surveys spanning three countries, of mothers using the PDF method verify that as a result of the PDF concepts, 88% breast-feed, compared to the national average of only 54% (from the National Center for Health Statistics). Of these breast-feeding mothers, 80% of them breast-feed exclusively without a formula complement. And while 70% of our mothers are still breast-feeding after six months, the national average encourage to follow demand feeding without any guidelines is only 20%. The mean average time of breast-feeding for PDF moms is 33 1/2 weeks, well above the national average. Over 50% of PDF mothers extend their breast-feeding toward and well into the first year. Added to these statistics is another critical factor. The average breast-fed PDF baby sleeps continuously through night seven to eight hours between weeks seven and nine. Healthy sleep in infants is analogous to healthy growth and development. Find out for yourself why a world of parents and pediatricians utilize the concepts found in On Becoming Babywise.
- This book is an awesome guideline!
This book was an absolute life-saver for my family. When my daughter was born, we thought that she had colic because she cried and cried- never wanted to sleep! We were going insane.. I was feeding her randomly, trying to play/sleep/eat and doing whatever to keep her happy, but she was NOT happy. A friend recommended this book to me, and it was the best advice I've ever listened to. Within 2-3 days, my baby was on a schedule of sleeping, eating, playing. The "colic" disappeared in those 2-3 days.. Everyone comments on what a happy, healthy, CHUBBY, sweet baby we have! She fell right into the schedule- that's all any baby needs is a pattern of what to expect throughout the day- its healthy.
I don't follow EVERY single step/idea/method in this book, but it is a great guideline for you to find out exactly what works for your baby- because every baby is different.
I will be going on to read the next books in this series because it works best for us.
Don't listen to all the negative feedback about this book, use your good judgement when using the methods that are given!
- Proud to have a Babywise baby
Edited 4/2009 to add:
I wrote the review before about my first child. I was wondering if it would work a second time. My second child just turned 2 months old, and she started sleeping through the night this week. She is happy, healthy and thriving. In fact, within 3 days of coming home, she pretty much put herself on the 3-hour schedule without additional training. She cried pretty much only around the 3 hour mark (give or take 15 minutes) from her last feeding, ate for 40 minutes, and was done.
Again, this is not for everyone. This time I also used the Baby Whisperer which has pretty similar scheduling, though that book seemed more strict about the time and less strict about crying it out. We found a good balance of the two techniques with our second baby, and it has helped us maintain a happy home.
I think that this book is not for everyone, but it certainly worked for my baby. He was on Babywise from the start, and now he is 2. He slept through the night at 2 months, and he continues to be a great sleeper both in naps and at night. Because of the tips from Babywise, I was able to quickly recognize that my baby was pretty sick at week 1, and he ended up being diagnosed as having severe acid reflux for which he was on medication for months. Without Babywise, I would not have been able to see the signs that he was crying in major distress instead of just being fussy. But with the flexible schedule (I kept a notebook), I could see that he was crying the same way within the same amount of time of eating and acting the same way with consistency. This saved us a lot of headaches.
And though I worked full time, I was able to breastfeed him until 14 months with plenty of milk and no issues. Because he was such an easy baby and toddler, we have travelled with him all over the US and even the world, but because we have a predictable schedule, he was able to enjoy the trips even with jetlag.
The whole book can be summarized in three points:
1) Make sure every feeding is a full feeding (no snacks, for us that meant 30 min breastfeeding or a 4oz bottle of breastmilk)
2) Start feedings at the same time every day
3) Be flexible and keep an eye on your baby's needs, but try to keep to the full feeding, playtime, nap on a 2.5 to 3 hour cycle
If you follow the 3 points above, you pretty have the value of the book without really reading it. There are ancillary points about not sleeping with your baby and keeping him the sling. The authors seem to be against "attachment parenting". I do not take such a hard line. The techniques are good, but I warn you that the book is particularly well-written or organized. If I were rating it on quality of writing, it would be a 3 star book.
For those looking for a published study about how attachment parenting and more structured method fare against each other, here is one study cited by NPR from the journal Pediatrics. It is less about feeding, but it does give you some information on how to get babies to sleep through the night. http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=5452458 It shows that balance is key.
- Horrible Book
I'd rate it with a zero if I could. Ezzo's whole concept is just ridiculous and I can't see how it is beneficial for mom or baby. The part that gets me really irritated is that new moms that have no idea where to start can take this guy's writing as a godsend. But I warn any mom out there that making a baby adhere to a schedule will just make you crazy. The book itself annoyed me, the concepts annoyed me, and the fact that people actually continue to buy into the ideas in the book really concerns me. I just hope at least one mom reads this and believes me. There are plenty of awesome baby advice books out there. Try a Dr. Sears book or just plain follow your instincts!!!...more info
- You need to read this!!
This book will change your life!
We read it and loved it. Not only does it give you someplace to start (bringing home that first baby is a scary thought!) but makes for a great baby. My daughter has always slept very well, been a joy to have around, eats well, etc. I reccommend this book to EVERY pregnant friend I know.
READ IT!!! ...more info
- I even reread it for my second child
This is a great book. It was VERY helpful with my first child but after I had my second I found my self forgeting baby world scheduling. I had to reread the book and it worked like a charm, back on sleeping schedule and feeding. I buy this book as a gift for every first time parent that I know....more info
- Hands down the best parenting book ever
Of all of the recommendations, advice, and gifts that we received with the birth of our first child, nothing beats this book. THIS BOOK REALLY WORKS. Our baby slept through the night at 6 weeks old and has never looked back. I am not a believer in the "quick fix/magical" approach to anything. This book is a common sense approach to sleep. It's not an extremist methodology. I would recommend it to absolutely anyone. It is hands down the best of all of the parenting books I've read....more info
- Read it cover to cover, applied it, and sorry for it
There's already been a lot of feedback written about this book, so I will try to keep this brief. It was given to me by 2 different families who have wonderful, well-adjusted children, so I read it and very much took it to heart. I enthusastically recommended it to people even before I delivered because it sounded so wonderfully ideal for baby and parents.
Unfortunately, after much time exercising the advice with my daughter my circumstances forced me to face that it wasn't working for us. In fact, I believe that applying these principles greatly contributed to my difficulties nursing and my daughter's failure to thrive. (She lost weight the first 6 weeks and it took a few months to regain to her birth weight. Interestingly enough, the author even attributes his method to resolving this same issue in a demand-fed failure-to-thrive infant in one of the chapters! That's why I had a hard time just giving up his methods.)
(I think the author relies on his/his wife's experience too heavily and attempts to apply this to all mothers. The fact of the matter is, all women are different with regard to lactation and all babies are different in their skill/efficiency in stimulating lactation. I'm glad they did not have these issues. It's emotionally taxing and I wouldn't wish it on anyone.)
It took several months for me to completely abandon most if not all of the advice here and for our feeding and sleeping to find a healthy pattern for us. My daughter didn't sleep "through the night" for a very long time, but my priority had to become to feed her and see her grow. In fact very early on (10 months) I discovered that she awoke at night because she had to relieve herself. Understanding this made potty training incredibly efficient and we achieved some success with it very early. Now at age 2 she will wake some nights to use the bathroom and get back into bed. I don't mind the brief interruption to sleep. She's never had problems wetting the bed. I wonder if I had been so focused on uninterrupted sleep if I'd have noticed this pattern and been able to take advantage of it to teach her what that "sensation" is.
Ultimately I will admit that after fighting an uphill battle trying to apply the counsel here I reluctantly fell into a style more like that of the "demand-feeding, attachment parent" that the author criticizes continually throughout the book. I'm proud of that fact now. To become what I resisted for the good of my daughter and my family just shows me how empowering motherhood is and that my priorities can be right on the mark.
My daughter is as intelligent and well adjusted as the children I hoped/tried to model when I eagerly awaited the opportunity to apply the advice in this book. I guess there are several ways to be a good parent and this book is not necessarily a "silver bullet" for all readers. I'm glad it worked for them, but I respectfully disagree that this is the one and only way to be "Baby Wise".
I'm pregnant again and due in 3 weeks. This time I'm doing things very differently. Just for starters...I threw this book away....more info
- A must have!!!
This book worked with both of my girls. They were sleeping through the night by 9 weeks. It was wonderful. I constantly referenced this book. It made me feel like I actually knew what I was doing as a first time parent. Anything that can give you that kind of confidence and results it worth the read....more info
- The best advice I have ever received as a first time parent....
I would have to agree that this book is amazing- for those parents that have negative remarks have either not tried it or have not given themselves enough time to try it. Why do parents think they are "forcing" their babies to eat, sleep,feed, and wake? They obviously don't know the advantages and the theory behind the concept of Baby Wise. On the other hand, there are parents that are perfectly fine with not having a schedule and I say "to each's own" (it's not for everyone). I am a working mother and need structure and a schedule- why is it so wrong to have a baby on a schedule? I am fine with getting my sleep during the night and knowing exactly what my baby wants and why she cries. The book teaches you to "guide" your baby on a cycle with structure. It doesn't harm your baby- my baby is in the 99 percentile in all of her measurements (weight, height, etc.). The book said exactly everything she would do...she slept throught the night at 7 weeks, sleeps an average of 11-12 hour per night, eats 4 times a day with 3 naps in between and she is so content. She is now 15 weeks and have been eating baby cereal for a week now (with my Pediatricians ok). Everyone says how "lucky" we are and she makes it easy for us but I would have to give credit to this book as well. It's not easy to stick with it for the first few months but TRUST me, the baby eventually gets used to the schedule. ...more info
- this book really helped!
we were loaned this book when we found out we were pregnant and ended up buying our own copy. i'm the sort of person that likes to plan things, and this made so much sense to me! i started using this schedule when our daughter was about 2 1/2 months and she fell right into the pattern. we were pretty flexible with it as she had reflux and i was having nursing issues, but she's done great. she started sleeping for 8 hours at night and taking 3 one hour naps a day at 3 months, by 5 months she was up to 9 1/2 to 10 hours at night and since then has moved up to being in bed by 7 or 7:30 and sleeps until 6 am, she also takes a 2 hour morning nap. i also breastfed, so i don't agree with the reviewers who say you can't use this book if you're breastfeeding. it worked for me anyway. our daughter is a very happy, active, social baby. she is in the 97% for height and the 63% for weight. our doctor says she's doing great! of course i also read a lot of other books and used techniques from "happiest baby on the block", but this was the one book i referred to over and over. i found it much easier to read and understand then "healthy sleep habits, happy child". if you like a schedule that can be flexible and want to get some sleep at night, i think this book can really help....more info
- Please be careful if you use baby wise
We have been doing baby wise for 6 months now and my daughter has been sleeping through the night since 8 weeks as they claim in the book. Great for us right!? Well they also say to watch your milk supply. How exactly do you do that? It is not explained so I thought because she was still sleeping through the night that she was getting enough to eat at each feed. Sounds logical right? Well, she lost a few ounces and was told she was failing to thrive by our pediatrician and now I am waking her up twice through the night and had to get my milk supply back up because we are exclusively breast feeding. If you are OK with supplementing with formula, then fine. Just know that if you want to exclusively breast feed, you have to WATCH YOUR MILK SUPPLY! Please be careful. We had no idea mine had gone down. The scheduling does help, just please be careful if you are a breast feeding only mom! By the way my daughter is doing just fine now and we have fixed the problem and my supply is fine, I just felt the need to warn people about this! If yours does go down you can fix the problem with adding feeds(which baby wise slowly cuts out by the way) pumping, lots and lots of fluids of course, sleep and also the mothers milk tea has helped me. I am now back to waking up during the night and would have rather done this back when my daughter was younger! good luck!...more info
- Excellent Reading!
I heard about this book from someone else and they said it works! I can't wait to try it! The idea makes sense and I hope I can have a full night's sleep by the time my child is 8 wks old....more info
- Great Book!!
What a great book! Thanks to this book our 6 month old is a happy, well adjusted baby. She is eating great and sleeping well through the night. Don't listen to the "attachement parents" comments and read this and decide for yourself if this is how you want to raise your child....more info
- Great So Far!
I just recently purchased this book and am half way through it thus far. It's a very quick and easy read. From what I've read so far, it is going to be very helpful when my baby arrives! I definitely recommend reading it, if nothing else to help you form an educated decision on how you want to approach feedings and sleep with your infant....more info
- Babywise is wonderful!
In my expereince there are three kinds of parents; those who haven't heard of Babywise, those who love Babywise and those who hate Babywise. My friends who hadn't heard of it want to learn more because they want to know the key to having such a happy child. Those I know who hate Babywise are frazzled and tired even though they say that attachment parenting is the way to go. Those who love Babywise are rested and truly enjoy parenting. I LOVE BABYWISE. My 16 month old son is a babywise baby. He learned to fall asleep on his own at 3.5 weeks (I didn't nurse him to sleep) and started sleeping 10 hours through the night at 16 weeks even though he has GERD. He has developed typically and early on many things (smiling, babbling, crawling, etc...). Babywise is a terrific guide to parenting your child from the beginning. It is about creating a routine, teaching your child to fall asleep on their own and sleeping through the night as well as napping well. It encourages breastfeeding and primarily doing so on a routine, but to meet your child's needs first. Therefore if your child is hungry 2 or 2.5 hours after their last feeding go ahead and feed them instead of waiting until the 3 hour feeding has arrived. The need to early feed especially occurs when they are growing or sick. I followed the 3 hour routine then 4 hour (when he was older) with my child and he has thrived. Don't think that Babywise isn't for breastfeeding mothers-this is a myth. Babywise also discusses babies with low-birth weight, preemies and those with health issues and creating a routine that meets their needs. Remember that most NICU babies are on 2-3 hour feeding routines. Also, it discusses that demand feeding is not the only way to develop and maintain a good milk supply. It encourages it in the beginning, but discourages it after 10-14 days because by then milk supply should be established. Babywise maintains that regular feeding is the best way to maintain milk supply. I never demand fed and never had issues with my milk supply. Mainly Babywise is about teaching your child to sleep and sleep well because after that everything seems to fall into place. It teaches you how to train your child to fall asleep on their own without rocking, nursing or bottle feeding them to sleep and to sleep on a routine so not only the baby can anticipate his day, but so can the parents, which is quite an accomplishment when you have a newborn or a growing infant. Babywise empowers you to take control of your life as a parent when things can seem so out of control. Many, especially grandparents (my mother in particular) and those who advocate attachment parenting, may scoff at Babywise and it's principles touting it as neglectful or cruel. This statement couldn't be farther from the truth. Babywise follows AAP recommendations. Especially, in the beginning, it is challenging to follow Babywise, but parenting is a challenge. Once you well-established on a routine (for us it was around 6 weeks) life becomes so much easier and parenting much more enjoyable. Babywise does not advocate attachment parenting, babywearing, demand feeding or the family bed so if you are determined to practice these things this is not the book for you. If you are interested in taking control of your life as a parent, raising a happy and healthy baby, having people tell you how lucky you are to have such a pleasant baby and SLEEPING then read and live the Babywise way. BTW-My mother quickly changed her mind about Babywise and now tells everyone about how terrific it is....more info
- Thankful for EASY schedule
I didn't follow all the advice from the book...however the EASY schedule does work. If anything EAT,AWAKE,SLEEP, YOURTIME is what you should take from this book. It works. Life is such less stress when you do...3 kids and used it everytime.
I do highly recommend CHildwise! Loved it. ...more info
Please, before considering this book, do some internet searching on RAD, and on the effects of cortisol on baby's brain, and on newborn and infant brain development...Ezzo is causing well-meaning parents to give their kids brain damage...
Anyone who considers their baby to be A PERSON will not do these things to their child! No one would ever treat an adult who was dependant on them this way...
SERIOUSLY I can TOTALLY TELL when a mom has used this book with her children just by the look in the kids' eyes...and the way they act...seriously, do some RESEARCH on what SCIENCE has to say about the effects of all this on your baby's brain before you do this...
I have had 8 children...I sleep all night every night and I did NOT use Ezzo's book...I read it with child 3 but did not use it THANK GOD!!!!!!!!...more info
- Shocked Amazon sells this still
Any book that advocates child neglect and abuse should NOT be sold by Amazon or ANY company, and I am shocked and disappointed that any parent could neglect their child by leaving them alone to cry themselves to sleep.
Being a parent is a 24/7 job. A baby is not an inconvenience only to be parented from 8 a.m. to 8 p.m. It is not spoiling, but LOVE, that makes a good parent tend to their child at 2 in the morning. It is not NATURAL for a new baby to sleep through the night - even adults don't do so.
This book needs burned, and I will be contacting Amazon's buyers to question their judgement on promoting a book which advocates such abuse. This is unacceptable....more info
- Ezzo is a fraud
Is Ezzo who he says he is? An inquiry by CT into Ezzo's background surfaces many new questions about his training, his conduct, and his professional interactions. Parents trust Ezzo to be professional and authoritative on parenting, yet many are not aware that he has no professional background in child development, medicine, or breastfeeding support.
Ezzo, GFI, and his publisher have attributed to him three different academic degrees that he does not have. Ezzo stated in writing that he had an associate's degree in business from Mohawk Community College in Utica, New York, even specifying a major and a grade-point average. He never graduated from that school, officials say.
GFI and Ezzo's publisher, Multnomah, have both said he earned a master's degree in Christian education, but he holds no such degree. The master of arts in ministry that he does have gives significant credit for life experience and is designed for noncollege graduates.
Two California churches have issued statements saying that Gary Ezzo, president of Growing Families International (GFI), is unfit for Christian ministry. Both of the churches have interacted closely with Ezzo.
Ezzo and his wife, Ann Marie, developed the popular yet highly controversial infant-feeding program outlined in Preparation for Parenting. They also developed the bestseller On Becoming Babywise and several church-marketed programs for parents, including Growing Kids God's Way.
Living Hope Evangelical Fellowship of Granada Hills, California, officially "excommunicated" Ezzo on April 30. Ezzo and his wife had already stopped attending the church.
The elders of Living Hope issued a statement saying they believe Ezzo is "biblically disqualified from all public ministry" because of a lack of truthfulness, Christian character, and accountability.
Two other congregations have taken similar punitive measures against Ezzo in the past 20 years.
Living Hope is the congregation to which Ezzo said he was accountable when Sun Valley's Grace Community Church, pastored by author John MacArthur, severed its support for Ezzo and GFI.
Grace Community is where Ezzo served as a staff member and first developed his parenting programs. Grace disavowed all association with GFI in October 1997, publicly rebuking him due to divisiveness.
Grace Community also rejects GFI curriculum. "[Ezzo] failed to draw a clear line between what is biblical and what is his preference," Phil Johnson, an elder at Grace Community, told the Southern California Christian Times in September. "The whole thing is fraught with danger. It obscures what is biblical."
MacArthur issued a second statement on July 25, saying he believes Ezzo is disqualified "from Christian leadership or public ministry in any context" and that character issues Grace brought to Ezzo's attention years ago remain unresolved. More than 15 years ago, His Vantage Point Church in Laconia, New Hampshire, asked Ezzo to step down as pastor-teacher in part because of his divisive conduct.
Churches are not the only ones severing ties to Ezzo and GFI. The accounting firm of Hamilton, Boynton, and Speakman terminated its relationship with GFI in February. The firm has issued no corporate comment. But Chris Hamilton, a partner at the firm, says Ezzo misled him personally regarding the firm's investigation of whether GFI funds were misappropriated....more info
- It worked for me!
Before trying Babywise, I tried demand feeding because it just felt better. However, it just wasn't working! The baby was constantly crying and constantly eating, and I had no idea what to expect next. My sister used Babywise with her three kids, and she highly recommended me giving it a try. The very FIRST day I used the concepts of this book, her crying lessened dramatically. By 11 weeks, she was sleeping 8 hours a night, and now at 16 weeks, she is sleeping 10-11 hours a night. I don't know what I would have done without this book. ...more info
- LOVE this book!
I used the techniques in this book with my daughter Abigail. She sleeps though the night, 12 hours, and takes 2 naps daily. There are no battles between us when its time to go down. I place her in the crib and she puts her self to sleep. She is also a very happy baby...and I believe it is because of the schedule we have her on. She knows what to expect...when she's going to eat..sleep.etc... Most people say how lucky we are for having such a well behaved baby, but we know it's because of this book....more info
- My story
I have a 6 month old, happy, healthy, beautiful daughter....and I am definitely Babywise now.
I do not think everything there is to know about parenting can be taught in one book. But, I really think if used properly, this book can help you raise a happy, healthy baby. Obviously, regular checkups with a good doctor can let you now if your baby is growing at the right pace. Our daughter has always been in the normal ranges. If something doesn't work with your child, obviously try a different method. This is not a must read, but I think you will find the ideas work and have positive effects on you and your child.
The main idea early on with Babywise is to begin to work on full feedings. You will find after full feedings and hopefully, some good playtime, that your baby begins to sleep for longer periods of time. Through the night? Not at first...that isn't the point. The point is to get your baby on a regular schedule of "eat, play, sleep". It sounds as if this is mentioned in other books. As your baby gets older, the schedule gets more and more extended. One day, you find your 5-6 month old sleeping 11 hours. Plus, she is happy and playful throughout the day.
One misconception is that you are supposed to let your baby cry it out. This is not 100% true. You need to distinguish between a hungry cry and sleepy cry. With a hungry cry, we absolutely fed our baby, But, if our baby had a full meal and playtime, we generally let her cry herself to sleep. Did we ignore her the entire time? If it lasted more than 10 minutes, we would go in, hold her, kiss her and then leave again. It was all about the type of cry. We could always tell she just needed to sleep. The cries never lasted more than 20-30 minutes, but most of the time, less than 5 minutes. Upon waking, she was happy and ready to start the cycle again.
During playtime, we did the normal parenting things; singing, reading, bouncing, etc. I don't believe my baby is going to be a sociopath as someone mentioned. Nor do I think she is dehydrated or failing to thrive. I do know that I know the best way to raise my kid and that is to do it the Babywise way. Can't wait until number 2.
- Love the book, hate the 'controversy'
I'm a huuuuuge fan of this book. When I found out I was expecting twins, a good friend of mine, also a twin mom, said "buy the book, drink the koolaid and your life will be so easy!" And she was right. When I tried to hire a doula, omg, the flack I got. One doula said she knew that the book had "killed" babies since the author thinks it is fine to 'starve' your babies.
All I can say is that in my edition, bought here on Amazon, there were zero references to starving your babies or forcing them to go for hours and hours without eating. In fact, he recommends turning off all the clocks and hiding your watches for your first 4 or 6 weeks home. He talks about honoring your marriage, including your partner in the process and finding a good schedule for everyone in the house. At six weeks, my twin girls were sleeping 6-7 hours at night and now, at 3.5 months, they sleep 10+ hours no problem.
The book helped give us the confidence to figure out the different cries and what they meant. If they just finished eating and we put them down and they cried 10 minutes later, we didn't just go straight to assuming they were hungry. We checked diapers and re-swaddled them and played some white noise and 9 times out of 10, that fixed their issue. If they were still hungry after all that, then, sure we fed them. My biggest focus was on making sure that the time between feedings got a bit longer as the weeks went on. I thought Ezzo really explained breastfeeding well. And the surprise chapter (for me) at the end was reading that one of the authors was a father of triplets.
Especially if you are expecting more than one baby, this book is a must! ...more info
- Excellent and sound advice
My daughter used the method in this book with her newborn daughter (bottle-fed) and it has been amazing. Little Hannah (3 months old now) is a happy, contented, bright-eyed little girl and my daughter is a well-rested new mom. The philosophy in this method is very sound psychologically and physiologically. Following this schedule means your baby gets fed before she actually experience hunger pains. It teaches your child that she WILL be cared for and never will need to scream to be fed. She can relax, knowing she will receive food even before she recognizes she needs it. What a wonderful way to teach a child to trust her parents, which is the primary task of a new baby's learning. This is contrary to what my generation of parents were told to do with 'demand' feeding. As I compare the two methods I realize that 'demand' feeding taught my babies they had to demand and scream in order to be fed and it taught them to be demanding babies. None of my kids slept through the night before they were 9 months old while my granddaughter on this method slept through the night quite comfortably at 2 months! Recognizing that this might not work for every baby, I am none-the-less a true believer in this method of child care, which by-the-way, our grandmothers and most previous generations did as a matter-of-fact in raising and training their babies!...more info
- thank you for giving me confidence!
I don't agree with the reviews saying that you are "forcing" your child to wait to eat by using this method. If you actually read the entire book, it's crystal clear that their theory is: if your baby is hungry, then FEED them! This book gives parents confidence to know their baby, be able to read their baby's cues and give them what they really need. It helps to establish a routine, which is critical for you and your baby. A routine helps the baby to feel secure and cared for, and helps you to predict what they will need next. Ezzo is very clear about NOT watching the clock, but rather listening to your baby, and gives great suggestions for soothing your baby. Be sure to read the entire book, not just the chapters that seem to pertain to you. Of course, every baby is different and you need to be flexible, but it talks about being flexible with this concept several times in the book. Personally, I loved it. I had 8 friends who all had babies within 6 months of each other. 5 of us used this and all of our babies are great eaters, sleepers and are happy babies. The other 3 are still having trouble getting their babies to sleep (10 months later) and their babies are finicky and cranky a lot! There's all the proof I need....more info
- I thought the book was great
i was able to BF my son until 14 months, and only feeding every 3 hours. I understand not all breasts produce the same, but it worked well for me. Also this system helps soo soo much to get baby to sleep through the night. It is a great skill for your baby to learn to self-soothe and calm down, rather than being rocked to sleep and then awakened as they are placed in bed. ...more info
- Married an Engineer
No one does this book 100%. Please read it and find your own groove. But you can't do it alone. Your partner has to read it, and if you're lucky... the grandparents will too.
We chose to start Baby Wise a few weeks after our daughter was born. The book tells you otherwise, but that was my "groove." We really loved the tips on how to help your child tell night-time from day-time. The author tells you over and over it's not a schedule. Schedules are rough on newborns. You've chosen to be a parent and the first 6 months are going to test your flexibility. (The next 16 years will test your patience!) The gist of this book is a routine: eat, play, THEN sleep. (Unless it's night time... read the book it makes sense.) This helps your child learn to fall asleep on their own instead of needing to eat. Every day will be a little different, but the order doesn't change.
Drawback? It doesn't tell you how to calm down an out-of-control baby. You know, there are some days your baby is going to be upset. That's okay, but what do I do? I liked the tips in the book, Happiest Baby on the Block. Just the table of contents was enough!
Success story? Our daughter consistently slept 8 hours a night when she was 3 months old and 12 hours a night when she was 6 months old. Thanks to Baby Wise! She's now 2.5 and has the best sleep habits. Going to bed is not a battle. She sleeps 12 hours a night and takes a two hour nap. Depending what you read, this reduces her risk for obesity and diabetes. It helps her attention span and if nothing else her attitude. She is such a happy kid!...more info
- Please do yourself and your mothers intuition a favor and don't buy it
Please, please just burn it.
This is the worst book imaginable about listening to your baby and responding to him/her appropriately.
Babies are born to be held, they are born to be loved... love them. There is no reason to put your baby on a strict schedule like this. All babies eventually evolve into a normal biological sleeping pattern similar to waking at 7am napping at 9, waking again, napping at 1 and sleeping at 7pm. It's natural and biological and happens to every human baby around the world. Don't give up yet. Just give your baby time and your baby will adjust. This is precious time, they will grow up before you know it and you will be sleeping again. Love them!...more info
- Great book because it worked. But I wasn't sure I applied it right.
I read the book before my son was born and when I was trying to incorporate the ideas in the first few weeks of his life, it was very difficult (maybe due to my lack of sleep). I felt like I wasn't getting it. Then after about 6 weeks, my son started loosing weight, due to different feeding complications (none of it due to the book and its teaching), so the lactation consultant told me I had to feed my son every 3 hours. It was wonderful. Before my son didn't seem to get into a schedule and maybe it was me doing something wrong, so I was always unsure when he would eat next or sleep. I did keep the same idea of eat, play and sleep for my son and he fell into a great pattern and routine. It continues to this day and he started sleeping through the night consistently at 8 weeks. He had slept 6 hours at night from about 4 weeks, so I will definitely use the principles of Babywise for my next child, as he is an excellent sleeping and napper.
I highly recommend it...more info
- On Becoming Babywise
I loved this book and used it for both of my babies! We had our second baby at the same time as our friends had their baby, and I gave her the book, but she didn't have the discipline to use it. The difference between our babies was unbelievable. Hers never took good naps and was cranky and tired constantly. She is one year old now and still can't fall asleep without a bottle and doesn't sleep well. Our baby slept through the night at 7 weeks old and is now a happy 15 month old who LOVES to sleep and takes two 2 hour naps a day and sleeps 12 hours at night. The difference in the strain on our marriages was huge too, because their baby was so cranky all the time and had to be rocked and held all day long, so her husband would come home to a filthy house and worn out wife, while I was able to do housework because my newborn took good naps all day long and my two year old took a two hour nap also. This is not just because I was "lucky" enough to have babies that slept well. I worked very hard with their schedules and had some hard days of having them learn to fall asleep on their own, but it is soooo worth it for the peace and harmony it brings to the family....more info
I read this in preparation for having our first child. Even before I had an actual baby to practice their techniques on I was confused. It's too hodge-podge. I didn't feel like he went into enough depth, basically he just said 'do this'.
When I did have a child to put to sleep I lost my mind. I had to keep going back to the book to try to remember if I was supposed to count the hours between feedings, naps, or what. I could never remember to actually look at the clock, never knew why I was doing what I was doing and I had a crying tired baby.
I was recommended "Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child" by Marc Weissbluth. My saving grace! This is the book that worked for me. He's an actual doctor. He's studied sleep. He explains WHY which helped me remember and adjust to my baby's unique biology. And he gives examples from real patients and offers different techniques. My baby slept. My 1 yo sleeps. He LOVES naps. He LOVES nigh' nigh' time.
Don't waist your time with a cheap knock-off. Read a book by a man with years of researching and study under his belt. You'll benefit. I promise. Everyone I've given the book to has....more info
- Theory good-as a whole terrible!
I just finished Babywise as I starred at my non-napping 10 month old baby who refuses to nap anywhere but in a swing, carseat, or while being worn who was giggling in his swing. Do I have a problem with this? NO! He's the happiest baby in the world. If he doesn't follow a "flexible schedule" (really a rigid schedule that if you're traveling or baby is sick you're allowed to feed your baby more often than every 2 1/2-3 hours).
Why did I read the book? It was given to me by my mom on a referral from a neighbor. She didn't know anything about it. I heard about it and decided to read it to see how it compares to my general following of Attachment Parenting.
I do not look down on any parenting style besides beating your child, neglect, etc. I do want to share a couple thoughts though...I was VERY angry when I read that if I wanted a fussy child that I would respond to my baby's cries, wear it in a sling, etc, etc. AY YI YI!!! Like I said-my son is the HAPPIEST baby ever. He was worn in a sling, wrap, etc from the beginning and I always respond to his cries. He was colicky in the beginning but is SO not a fussy baby. This book is SO negative about Attachment Parenting and has it made up in his mind that AP parents wear their babies 24-7, feed baby only when it shows hunger signs even if 10 hours pass, etc, etc. I say everything in moderation. The theory of a "flexible schedule" is a good theory-make sure baby gets fed often enough, has a bedtime (not 6 PM one night 4 AM the next which is kinda the feeling I got that he thinks AP parents do), etc. BUT "flexible schedule" is contradicted a ton when he says stuff like DO NOT feed your baby more often than every 2.5-3 hrs unless ABC or D happens.
What I got from it? I knew most of the stuff because of experiencing it about making sure baby gets enough feedings, etc. I do feel he isn't extremely supportive of breastfeeding when there's a couple page section on how wonderful bottle feeding is and how you shouldn't deprive a father of feeding his baby. I also feel he needs to TALK to some AP parents and maybe he'll have a broader view (but he seems like a pretty close minded person).
Bottom Line? You don't have to follow or believe everything you read and sometimes it's cool to see other perspectives. Everything in moderation. I encourage anyone that reads the Baby Wise books to also read Dr. Sear's books about Attachment Parenting and to keep an open mind about all parenting theories. Following your mothering instincts and draw from all of it :)!...more info
- Dangerous and misleading advice
The AAP has investigated Ezzo's parent directed feeding program because of concern that it can lead to dehydration and failure to thrive. Babies are not meant to eat on a schedule, nor are they meant to sleep through the night as early as Ezzo would have you believe. In my family, we slept with our babies and let them nurse throughout the night. We all slept very well, and my children never had ear infections, gastroenteritis, asthma, or any other health problems that can keep children and parents awake. Please, for your own sake and the health of your baby, read Dr. Sears' books instead....more info
- Babywise + Common Sense = More Sleep For All
I followed the general guidelines of the book for my 3 kids (I just had my 3rd 3 weeks ago) and feel that it does help you get more sleep. I find the 1 star reviews about babies not gaining enough weight because of this method interesting...I hope if you are having children you are smart enough to use common sense as well. You are not supposed to begin the feeding schedule as soon as a baby is born, you are supposed to work on establishing full feedings and letting your baby eat when you can. The book also says NOT to let your baby sleep more than 5 hours during those first weeks, but to wake them up and feed them. If you start trying to get your baby on the basic routine cycle of sleep, eat, awake, sleep, eat, awake they will fall into a fairly regular feeding schedule on their own. And if you are feeding them every 2 1/2 to 3 hours like suggested all day, as they get bigger and are eating more at each feeding, they start to go for longer periods each night. Do I think this book should be followed no matter what? Of course not, no book should. You should consider your own baby and your own situation and adjust accordingly. However, I believe if you do that with this book you will be getting more sleep soon. I highly recommend it to good parents....more info
- One of Satan's largest acomplishments
A sickening, disgusting book that is helping to destroy this country. Satan works extra hard in hospitals and anywhere a newborn is, since they are the foundation of God's people. The latest media alert by the American Academy of Pediatrics says it all: A strong correlation with this book has been documented in Babies who have failure to thrive and dehydration....more info
- On Becoming Babywise
This book was a tremendous help after the birth of our first baby. For the first month, I "demand fed" our daughter, and we never let her cry. We just tried to rock her to sleep. However, she rarely went to sleep on her own-one time was up with no nap all day long. I never knew when she would fall asleep at night, either. Instead of my baby crying, I cried! My sister-in-law sent me the book, and it answered every question that I had. Now I've used the principles successfully with three children, and I have had happy, healthy, well-trained babies who sleep through the night....more info
- Oh how I wish I'd bought this book earlier...
This book was highly recommended to me by a coworker and then by a family member. After receiving the recommendation, I bought the book when my baby was about six weeks old. At that time, as a first-time mommy, my baby would barely make it two hours between feedings, he was up a lot at night, pretty fussy shortly after eating, and absolutely no schedule existed. I read the book in a day and a half when it arrived and immediately began implementing some of the techniques discussed in the book. Within two days of starting that, my child was happier and going 2 1/2 to 3 hours between feedings. While I deviated from some of the techniques, the bottom line is that I have a happier baby, who sleeps for at least 5 hours at a time throughout the night and we have a schedule in place now that makes life better for the baby, myself, and daddy. Even if you don't implement the type of schedule the authors suggest, the book is absoultey still worth buying for all the pertinent information it contains on breast-feeding, bottlefeeding, awake time, etc...
This book is worth every penny - buy it as earlier in your pregnancy as you can!...more info
- Another tool in the mommy belt
This book, coupled with The Happiest Baby on the Block: The New Way to Calm Crying and Help Your Newborn Baby Sleep Longer, is a wealth of knowledge. The two books contradict each other BUT both are appropriate ways of managing life with a newborn. The goal of both books is to teach you how to manage life with a newborn and how to get the newborn to sleep through the night. Baby Wise teaches new parents when and how to feed their babies, play with their babies and let their babies sleep/ cry. The Happiest Baby on the Block teaches parents how to calm a baby and it is magical how the techniques in the book work. So what if the books don't agree with each other? I found both to very helpful. I'd suggest you read the Happiest Baby on the Block first.
Here's how the books have helped me:
Baby Wise is the reason my three week old's schedule is easy to manage. I feed her every three hours unless she's hungry earlier (she usually isn't). She wakes up every three hours at night too as if she has a built in clock. If she's ever inconsolable or fussy in a public place where I need her to be silent, I use the skills I learned from The Happiest Baby on the Block to calm her down. These books have made me a more confident mother, and they have made my baby happy too. ...more info
- This is the Baby Bible
I swear by this book and have used the concept for all 3 of my children. They have all been very content babies and started sleeping through the night regularly at 8 weeks. Like anything, you need to give it a solid shot for a good week to see results. Usually, by day 3 or 4 you will notice a huge difference. I recommend this book to everyone. ...more info
- Felt like an infomercial for the book you already bought
Honestly, I got tired of reading persuasions ever other paragraph on why I should use the babywise method. I already bought the book--I spent the money and was attempting to use the advice, stop telling me how great it is!
That said, I read this book before my daughter was born and during her first and second week I got incredibly anxious because I could not get her started on the recommended routine. The book contradicts itself saying to wait for 2 weeks to think about the routine, and then says that you can begin the routine on Day One. After reading this book, I thought that because I could not get my daughter into the BabyWise routine our life would be chaotic and unmanageable. Just the opposite. Once I stopped worrying about how long she needed to sleep, how to get her to eat-play-sleep in that order, and how to follow every recommendation my daughter and I created her own routine that suites us both.
Additionally, while the theory is good, and I am sure works for some babies, the routine is close to impossible to continue if you have a child care provider or babysitter for when mom returns to work.
- great tool, every mom should read!
my whole family, me and my two sisters, has read and implemented the guidlines set in babywise with our children. all of us have children who by three months of age sleep atleast eight hours a night, we can pretty much take them any where, they are happy and easily soothed, and adjust well to just life. my son when he was 6 weeks old slept 8 hours through the night, by 10 weeks he slept 10 hours, and by the third month he started sleeping 12 hours. I breastfed until he was six months, and then had to switch to formula because he was being too impatient. Now at 7+ months its is wonderful. I get him to take two 2 hour naps and 1 cat nap usually around 45 min right before our last feeding. Even if he doesn't want to take a nap he will just play in his crib and then take a shorter nap. Its wonderful. I am now on to reading babywise II and plan to follow them along with his growth. These books have helped me to one just know good information about infant feeding, sleep patterns, and good wake time activites. two give me confidence in my parenting and really make me a great parent. if you put in the time to read the books and the effort to stick to it (of course with your own flexiblity) they work. i have many friends as well that have used them... and everyone who has been true to the book has had wonderful promising results. i would recommend this book to every parent. also another great book is "The Secrets of the Baby Whisperer, by Tracy Hogg" She was a delight to read adn even offered a little more in depth information. But her guidlines are the same principles found in Babywise, but I actually enjoyed reading her book a little more. Check it out, its worth it!...more info
- baby wise by a schedule
I am a new mom, and bought this book based on its endorsements on the cover. After reading through the book, I became more anxious about feeding and sleeping than before I read it. He talked about 'hyperscheduling' as being a bad thing, and proposed a better solution... which looked just like hyperscheduling. Basically, feed the baby every 2.5-3hrs using a clock and time sheet. I didn't need to buy a book to tell me that....more info
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