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Parents in our post-modern world tend to be committed to but anxious about their child-rearing responsibilities. They've tried the countless parenting books on the market, but many of these are strident, fear-based books that loving parents instinctively reject, while still searching for direction.
Now Dr. Tim Kimmel, founder of Family Matters ministries, offers a refreshing new look at parenting. Rejecting rigid rules and checklists that don't work, Dr. Kimmel recommends a parenting style that mirrors God's love, reflects His forgiveness, and displaces fear as a motivator for behavior. As we embrace the grace God offers, we begin to give it-creating a solid foundation for growing morally strong and spiritually motivated children.
Releasing in an affordable trade paper edition, this revolutionary book presents a whole new way to nurture a healthy family.
This book is excellent. It is the how-to book on raising your kids as Christians. It is the detail book with his companion book, How to raise kids for true greatness being the big picture. I recommend them both....more info
- great book
Learn how to be a better parent is the greatest gift we can give our children
A Moment of Peace: Relaxation for Parents AudiobookA Moment of Peace: Relaxation for Children...more info
- Chill out!
This book was excellent in teaching me to chill out and have fun with my kids. I was trying to make them behave by giving them too many rules to live by. This book showed me how to ease up and enjoy them. Take away some of the rules that just brought our family down and have fun while taking the opportunity to teach Gos'd love and grace when their hearts are open to hear it!...more info
- This is the way everyone should have been raised from the beginning!
I initially got this book because the mom's group I had joined was going to be reading it, but they changed their mind right after I bought it. I knew nothing of this book or it's author, but I decided to give it a try since I now owned it. And I am so happy I did.
In reading this book, I discovered how I can love my children and treat them with respect (yes, respect my children!) while giving them the discipline they need to grow up to be loving, respectful adults. I was also able to recognize the mistakes that my parents had made with their parenting style that I hadn't been able to understand before, and how I don't have to repeat that cycle with my own children.
Tim Kimmel describes the loving, graceful way you can (and SHOULD) raise your children in such a way that you will want nothing more than to transform your home into a grace-based one right then and there. He lets you know that raising your children the grace-based way can be simple and very forgiving. That if you make mistakes in the parenting department, you can ask for forgiveness - not only from God, but from your children as well. He begs the question: "Why should you expect your children to respect you if you don't respect them?" He presents the grace-based way so that it naturally makes sense that this IS the way all children should be parented.
This book is packed with sensible, understandable information, but I found it be a very quick read (3 days with a toddler running around!). I highly recommend this book to anyone and everyone wanting a way to parent that is different from what we've always been offered....more info
- Inspiring and Practical
Most parents, whether Christian or not, want "good" children. Unfortunately, it's easy (and common) to think that "good" fits an appearance, and we can chase values that have little to do with a transformed heart and living faith.
It is easy to follow worldly goals for our children, as activities, friends, and appearance may be most easily measured. However, when we do this, we set a trap for ourselves and our children. We damage their hearts, restrict our relationship and influence with them, and may push them away from the true source of grace.
What should be the greatest gift - and difference - for a child raised in a Christian household?
GRACE. (Grace received, and grace given.)
Tim Kimmel delivers an exceptional view of parenting. He audaciously challenges parents to look into their own hearts, as well as their children. Meanwhile, he never loses sight of the call for believers to live in righteousness.
It is a balance that would trip up many, but this book avoids pushing a personal agenda by diving into - and wisely understanding - scripture.
If your hopes and prayers for your child include a living, growing, vibrant faith, then you must parent with grace. This is not always easy, and doesn't always result in perfect "looking" children. As the book explains, grace is not an absence of boundaries, and requires both discipline and direction.
Only a heart that is transformed can truly give and receive grace, and only grace can transform a heart. This book effectively argues that a grace-filled home will nourish a whole child, and grace-filled parents will introduce a gracious heavenly Father to their children's hearts. For those who want to see love, knowlege and faith grow in their homes, I highly recommend this book....more info
- A book to share with others
I bought three copies of this book. One to re-read myself and two to give to friends who have been struggling with trying to maintain a balance between love and discipline. I've read it twice now and honestly don't think that there is a better book on parenting our children the way that God parents us. Tim Kimmel writes straightforwardly and offers hope to those of us who may feel that we've been too rules-oriented and may be missing reaching the hearts of our children. He doesn't advocate a lack of discipline by any means, but he offers a practical way to make our kids accountable for their actions without damaging their spirits in the process. ...more info
- A necessary tool to being a balanced parent!
Tim Kimmel has done a good job of explaining how many conventional parenting styles fall apart later in a child's life & ultimately lead children to rebellion. It was hard for me to read many of his observations at first, as I myself was parenting with a heavy hand. I sort of felt chastised by him for the first half of the book! I guess I deserved it. I'm glad I hung in there though as he showed me how to lighten up by treating my children with the same grace that God extended to me through Christ. I truly believe I will be a better parent for having read this book! The results have already started to unfold with my three kids. I have been able to let go of some of the small issues I was making such a big deal over & focus more on important issues that matter. Since I rebelled hard as a teen, I was worried about how to handle that later in life when my kids are teens. I feel I am better equipped to deal with those unavoidable years of rebellion as my kids (hopefully) find their own way into the arms of God. I suppose before reading this I just thought I could push them into God's arms & maybe they'd stay there. Thanks Tim, you've lighted my path via your use of God's Word & your experience. I highly recommend this book to parents, grandparents, counselors and teachers....more info
- The Best Parenting Resource Besides the Bible
I recently read this book after hearing Dr. Kimmel on a radio program. It is absolutely phenomenal. God has been leading me down the path of understanding His grace for some time now. I am a strong advocate of having an intimate, vibrant relationship with Jesus Christ, and I've been looking for ways to apply that grace to my parenting. This book completely reiterates everything I believe about God's grace and how to apply it in the home.
Let me be clear, we do not believe in a home of license - we have strong boundaries. But we don't make our son do things that aren't relevant. We don't force him to be quiet when there is no need to be. We let him be himself, well behaved, of course. I'm so impressed with this book that I've started buying it for young mommies and expecting mommies in my church. I'm blessed with a leadership team that is also committed to God's grace and leading people into a real relationship with Jesus.
This is probably the very best parenting book (other than the Bible) that I've read - and believe me, I've read them all. Dr. Kimmel should be commended for walking where God wants him to walk. More people need to be emphasizing God's grace....more info
- Changing the way you think!
This was a refreshing look (though, really not a new concept) at Biblical Parenting. I'm aware that there a mounds of books out there that deal with specific behavior issues and how best to quash them. What was wonderful about this book is the look at embracing the Grace that our Lord has shown us and blessing our children with it. By no means is this about being permissive or allowing our children to wander out into the world on their own, our children must have consequences for their actions just as we do for ours. However, Dr. Kimmel explains the future issues that often arrive by trying to strongly control our children and their environment. It is granting our children the same same unconditional-love relationship we know through the sacrifice of Christ that our Father in heaven gives all his children as well as the freedom to make decisions for themselves. It provides insight into fostering security through love, assisting in their purpose, and fortifying their hope....more info
- Love it!
It is exactly what I needed. After raising two boys and seeing the after math of our parenting skills, this book hones in on the essence of relationships...Grace. That's the way God parents us. Can we do it any differently? Been there, done that! Tim presents balance; Grace without compromise of godly standards. If you could own one parenting book, I would choose this one! ...more info
- Grace of the parents
I have not read this book, YET, but I have read others that Tim Kimmel has written. And I have the advantage of knowing how his parents raised their children. When he was a child, we went to the same fundamental, independent Bible-believing church in Western PA. Everybody loved to go to their home because there was always something happening. His parents were strict, but accepting and gracious to all who visited them. So my comments have to be that Dr. Kimmel knows that of which he writes because he lives it....more info
In preparation for the arrival of my first child in 1998, I read many Evangelical parenting books. These books sought to encourage new moms like me with moving discussions of the importance of our role. These books also provided practical discipline strategies. But, as a first-time mom, I needed more than ennobling rhetoric and discipline techniques. I sought a comprehensive, Biblically-based framework for parenting that would help me to structure and evaluate my day-to-day interactions with my child. I couldn't find anything that met my needs in any of the many books that I read. Dr. Kimmel's book provides the framework I've been searching for and is an outstanding addition to the Evangelical parenting literature.
I especially appreciated the author's use of Scripture to develop his framework, particularly his analyses of Jesus' interactions with children. Matthew 18:5-6 and 10, for example, provide motivation for Dr. Kimmel's point that children feel significant when they know they have their parents' attention. Mark 9:36-37 underlies Kimmel's argument that children feel secure when they receive affection.
My only regret is that I wasn't aware of this book when it first came out! My only criticism of the book is that it doesn't contain enough practical application material. ...more info
- Grace is...
This is not only the best parenting book I have ever read, it has been helpful on many other levels. I was inspired to buy this book by the other reviews on this website, specifically one that noted that this book makes you feel empowered to send your kids to public school, knowing that they/we are to be a Light, instead of hiding in "safe" environments.
This book is geared toward fine-tuning for the Christian parent, and assumes that the reader is starting from a place of belief in the Bible. I was raised in a Christian home but knew that I was lacking something(s) I just couldn't put my finger on. This book hit it right on the head for me. One of the main themes in the book, your child's three driving inner needs, is exactly right.
Besides being a great source for Christian parenting, it helped me find that bridge between being a Christian, and having a Godly attitude toward others. For me, the pivotal sentence in this book is this: "grace is receiving something we don't deserve but desperately need." This realization has allowed me to let go of some hurts that I have struggled with for years. Not only that, but I realized I was holding on to a legalistic view that "I am right," with my five-year-old, instead of setting an EXAMPLE.
This book is well written, funny, and a page-turner, if any parenting book is! I highly recommend this book. ...more info
- Excellent Helpful Read!
Grace Based Parenting is a wonderful guide to loving and guiding children as God lovingly wants to guide humanity. I have my clients read this when they feel overwhelmed to be the perfect parent, or believe that there is only one way to parent, or are feeling defeated in their parenting skills. There is "GRACE" for both parents and child. A must read!...more info
- Excellent parenting book at any stage
Do you wonder how children of Christ-following homes really differ from peers? There are lots of good kids out there - and many of them are not Christian. If appearance and behavior aren't the best measuring sticks for a God-infused life, than what is?
This book is excellent for any stage of parenting. Read it yourself, and get a copy for anyone you want to encourage. It renews the confidence and joy of parenting in faith.
The book gives lots of vivid examples. He explains the difference between a legalistic, rules-based home and homes of true grace (complete with moral boundaries and consequence for sin). He opens his own experiences, as well as others' (both good and bad). He is generous with scripture to give a firm foundation to his writing. He points out the pitfalls and traps that seem so attractive to parents who want the best for their kids. His solutions are not always the easiest or most popular, but he gives us a vision of raising children into authentic, faithful, strong adulthoods.
I found his writing refreshing, and the principles of his book empowering. If you hope your children will grow up transformed beyond surface behavior and appearances, I encourage you to read this book....more info
- Good in general, but a little disappointing at the end
Overall I felt this was a great book. The author made some great points about Christian parenting and tied it into key biblical passages. He was very general, though. If you're new to grace-based parenting, and don't have any role models to turn to, you might be left asking what's next? How do you really implement grace-based discipline? I felt I needed more specifics. But where I was truly disappointed was at the very end when the author condoned spanking. I honestly don't see how you can hit a small child in grace....more info
- great book
I am so keen on raising a perfect child - this helped me realize that what I really want is a perfect relationship with my child -and that too much criticism of my sensitive daughter's implusiveness could make her feel unloved and insecure - also made me realize that I need to help her see her greatest talents and encourage her in that - so I don't see her when she's older just wondering from one thing to the next - but that I need to help her find her niche. I wish I had been parented like this.
- My kids needed me to read this book
I highly recommend this book! One important way this book helped me was by showing me the alternatives to grace-based parenting. In reading these it made me realize just how ungracious I so often am towards my kids. In the heat of the moment I have a bad tendency to be fear, shame or guilt-based in my parenting. I'm praying for grace to be gracious! This book has made me stop and consider if I believe God is a harsh Father who heaps shame on me and compares me to other Christians who seem to have it so much more 'together' than I do. So this book has helped me see God, myself and my kids in a different light. Kimmel encourages us to give our kids the freedom to be different and to make mistakes, while at the same time giving a "love that is secure, a purpose that is significant, and a hope that is strong." This is good stuff!...more info
Read only a chapter (which are long) at a time because Kimmel packs so much info into topics that your brain needs time to put ideas into behaviors you can incorporate into your parenting. A great read!...more info
- Grace Based Parenting
Amazing. I have read a number of parenting books and this one is by far the most helpful, the most hopeful. I have already shared my amazement of this book with my friends and also with other new moms and moms groups. How would anyone parent without this grace based perspective? This book has caused me to reflect on my own childhood as well as clarify the way I would like to raise our children. Kids are all different and we cannot parent them on a basis of fear. I am very grateful for Dr. Tim Kimmel and his willingness to share this hopeful and helpful perspective on parenting. If you are a parent or have ever been a parent, this is a must read....more info
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