|Good Night, Sleep Tight: The Sleep Lady's Gentle Guide to Helping Your Child Go to Sleep, Stay Asleep and Wake Up Happy
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"Getting a young child to go to sleep and stay asleep is one of the most challenging aspects of parenting. Yet many parents resign themselves to enduring years of exhaustion. Practical help is not easy to find, and much of the available advice stresses letting even very young babies "cry it out," an option that is not comfortable for many parents. Kim West, known to her clients as "The Sleep Lady", has developed an alternative and effective approach that is gentler on both parent and child. West emphasizes that sleep is a learned skill and explains how parents can teach children to sleep, even at an early age. She starts with newborns, showing parents how to avoid sleep problems from the beginning. And she has solutions for older babies and children who have developed poor bedtime, nighttime, or nap time habits. "The Sleep Lady" method-including a gentle, practical, step-by-step program called "The Sleep Lady Shuffle" -- has proven effective for hundreds of families. West has spent more than a decade successfully teaching parents how to help their children sleep soundly and independently through the night. She provides specific, achievable guidelines that work, while also taking into account the values, lifestyles, and parenting styles unique to each family. Most parents who adopt The Sleep Lady Shuffle see dramatic improvements in a few weeks, if not days. Good Night, Sleep Tight contains age-specific chapters from birth through five years old, in which West succinctly outlines what action to take; discusses important developmental changes; provides sample waking, feeding, and napping schedules; advises how to use "The Sleep Lady Shuffle"; and lays out common problems and solutions. Included throughout are real-life testimonies and anecdotes from parents West has assisted. Good Night, Sleep Tight also discusses co-sleeping, bedtime strategies for twins and siblings, and dealing with nightmares and illnesses. West even offers tips on how to minimize sleep disruption when families travel or experience other breaks in routine. Essential reading for any tired parent, or any expectant parent who wants to avoid the pitfalls of sleeplessness, Good Night, Sleep Tight offers a practical, gentle, easy-to-follow remedy that will work for all families in need of nights of peaceful slumber.
About the Author
Kim West, known as "The Sleep Lady" by her clients, has helped more than a thousand parents learn to listen to their intuition, recognize their child's important sleep cues and behaviors, and gently create changes that promote and preserve healthy sleep habits. Kim, a mother of two and a Licensed Certified Social Worker-Clinical (LCSW-C), has been a practicing social worker for more than twelve years. She received her Master's degree in Clinical Social Work from Simmons College in Boston, Massachusetts. Kim lives with her family in Maryland.
Joanne Kenen is a journalist and mother of two who first met Kim West professionally while seeking a remedy for her younger son's sleep difficulties. Joanne graduated from Harvard University, then went on to report from Latin America and the Caribbean, New York, and Miami before settling in Washington, D.C. For the past ten years she has been a Washington, D.C.-based writer, specializing in U.S. politics, health care, and health policy. Joanne lives with her husband and their sons outside of Washington, D.C."
- great for twins
i picked up this book because it was mentioned in a review for sleep training twins. while there is a sections for twins, it is essentially the same method except for going back and forth between the 2 babies...it really works. at 9 months, i started sleep training my boy/girl twins. the first night they cried for about 25 minutes. the second night - half that much. the third night, they started getting used to the routine. while it did take the full scheudule to really get them used to falling asleep on their own, it is a skill that well worth learning. and so very awesome for the parents!...more info
- 6 Months Later, the Baby Sleeps Great
My daughter was always a pretty good sleeper (naps in crib/swing, first half of the night in her own crib, second half co-sleeping), but around 5 months-old she started waking up every hour, and I was at a total loss as to what to do about it. I had been reading the Sears' Baby Book and was wary of sleep training and cry-it-out, but when we were loaned this book I was so exasperated I was ready to give The Sleep Lady Shuffle a try.
I started reading it after putting the baby down for the first time one night, and by the time she woke for the first time I had read enough to know that I was perpetuating her problem with my rush to nurse her at the first cry.
The biggest change that the Sleep Lady Shuffle brought about for us was the cessation of using nursing as the automatic go-to. But because my daughter would not take no for an answer from me, which West grants is frequently the case with nursing babies, this meant that my husband took point at night and was the "shuffler" while I stayed out of view.
This was as tough on my husband and me to get used to as it was on our daughter. My husband was used to uninterrupted sleep all night, since I, the nursing Mommy, had always been on the night shift. He was grumpy about having to deal with a fussing baby. And I was a wreck having to listen to my baby cry (and my husband grouse) without being able to DO anything about it. Plus, having read Sears, I was seriously doubting the worth of the program altogether and worrying that I was traumatizing my baby needlessly.
Nevertheless, West makes it clear that you have to give your baby time to adjust, about 2 - 3 weeks, and I was committed to giving it a full try before reverting to the Sears way. I'm happy to say that within 3 weeks our daughter was going to sleep on her own and the frequent night wakings ended. Because I am committed to nursing, I would nurse her before she went to bed (something West is actually opposed to generally), and then I would pick her up for a dream feed right before I went to bed. That way I knew that I wasn't starving my baby by not nursing her throughout the night. Eventually I stopped the dream feed, and now, at nearly 12 months, my daughter is sleeping 11 - 12 hours a night and taking two 1.5 - 2 hour naps during the day. She goes to sleep on her own, and when she wakes she plays and talks to herself happily in the crib until we get her.
One important point that West discusses that I found very valuable is early rising. She makes it clear that you have to be as consistent with get-up times as you are with bedtimes, and advises that you treat an early morning waking the same as you would a night waking.
All in all this book has been great. I appreciate West's flexible approach and understanding that every baby is different. At the same time, she is very firm about the absolute NEED for babies and small children to get enough quality sleep, which I think is definitely true and has been borne out by my experience.
I have recommended this book to many friends, and will buy a copy for myself now that baby #2 is on his way. I want to get him off to the right start!...more info
- Amazing book - our son finally sleeps better!
This book is amazing. We read so many books searching for answers to get our son to sleep. When we got this book he was 13 months old and still waking up every 1-2 hours throughout the night. We read this, started a regular bedtime routine, and then introduced the sleep shuffle. We liked this book because it wasn't just one of those "leave your baby alone in the room and let them cry" books. Our son is now 18 months old and he sleeps so much better. When he wakes up in the night, he can usually get himself back to sleep - he only needs us to go in there once or twice during the night now. Which is a HUGE improvement. We never actually got to the point where we can put him in the crib and leave and he'll fall asleep. Now we do our bedtime routine, place him in the crib, and stay in the room while he falls asleep. We'll work on being able to leave the room at some point in time. But for now, we are so incredibly grateful for this book! And this book is divided into stages - so you can see how to work with your little one at whatever age they are. We highly recommend this book!...more info
- Not "Gentle"
I was told that this was an alternative to the CIO method but it really isn't. You just stay in the room while they scream instead of leaving. It even suggests you keep a towel handy because your child may get so upset that he/she throws up, but if that happens you are still not supposed to pick them up. I don't consider that "gentle"....more info
- made a believer out of me!
West's book and method was highly recommended by my beloved acupuncturist, so I started reading it just after my daughter was born, but found I was NOT ready for West's advice at the time. We hadn't anticipated co-sleeping, but resorted to it when my daughter had trouble getting comfortable enough to sleep. We happily endured almost 7 months of this arrangement. I eventually hit a wall with nursing on demand all night long after traveling for the holidays and then coming home to fight the annual Christmas cold. I re-read this book and got some pep talks from friends. I cried; My husband reassured me.
Once we agreed to do it, I took every word of the "Sleep Lady Shuffle" instructions to heart and we put it into practice and had magnificent results. We too found increments of success every couple nights of the process and were so pleased to find consistent results after a week! Our daughter now goes to sleep in her crib in her room and falls back to sleep on her own if she stirs. I thought the 3-night increments of the "Shuffle" were described very well and the case studies were spot on. Sleeping full nights has really shaped up her daytime routine as well - she is now hungry for food in addition to milk, and her naptimes increased from sporadic half hours to 1-1/2 hours at a time. My husband and I are sleeping full nights for the first time since our little girl was born. I initially read this book with a very skeptical eye and now I think of Kim West as our family's Sleep Lady.
(One note in response to the comment that this book prohibits parents from picking up a hysterical child: I got the impression that West urges common sense in this matter and if you feel your child is becoming upset beyond reasonable limits, you will do what your child needs you to do.)...more info
- I finally get my sleep at night!!!!!!!!!
At 5 months my son would only fall asleep in our bed, with pacifier in his mouth and me holding his hand. Then he was up every hour and half to nurse. I was so sleep deprived I could barely do anything around the house, so my friend gave me this book. At 5 month and two weeks my son was sleeping through the night, falling asleep by himself, in his crib and without pacifier!!!!! He never cried for more than 5 minutes when we were teaching him!!!!!!!!!! I am soooooo happy this book exists!!!!!!!!!!!...more info
- not worth it
This is essentially a "cry it out" book, except she recommends staying in the room for the crying part. There is no new information I could find. So utterly not worth it. It seems that this book was written to generate sales for her individual consultation service. If you've read "No Cry Sleep Solution" and "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" you do not need this book. Just meet the ideas in the middle and realize there will be some uncomfortable nights, then spend your money on something worthwhile....more info
- The ONLY way to teach your baby to sleep! It really works!
Kim West is a God-send! And her book is easy to follow and divided into age-related sections for the sleep-deprived parent. You need only read the chapter that pertains to your child. Thanks to this book, both of my girls sleep in their own beds, in their own rooms and through the night. I will be using her techniques to sleep-train my third child too! If there is one book that you purchase, this one MUST be it. It makes a great baby shower gift too!...more info
- This book saved my sanity!!
When my son was three months old I still had to rock him to sleep every night. Once he fell asleep I would have to hold him for two hours before I could even lay him down. I was going crazy so I went to the library and found this book along with two others and this book blew me away. It was so perfectly detailed and seperated for each stage of life and age group. In a week my son was falling asleep on his own and slept through the whole night. I couldn't believe it. I tell everyone that this book saved my sanity, because you start to think after awhile that you are going to loose your mind if you child and YOU don't get sleep soon. I highly recommend this book to any and everyone. I like to give it as a baby shower gift. :) ENJOY!...more info
- A good mix of sleep strategies
I first read Babywise, which a friend had given me. We started on a flexible schedule with feedings about every three hours. This was very helpful and a good start, but after reading some negative things about the book, I wanted to read some others. There are so many different theories on sleeping and feeding! I found Good Night, Sleep Tight and really liked it because it seemed to be a good mix of the different theories. There are a few main components that almost every sleep book I've read recommends, including having a bedtime routine, putting the baby down drowsy but awake, and creating a sleep friendly environment. This book begins with those basic components and gives you additional information and resources. I like that it gives some guidance as to what a typical schedule might be like, what you might expect, etc. It's also nice to see that what you're experiencing is very normal and that there are things you can do about it. My son started sleeping through the night at about 3 months. Naps are still a little difficult to settle him down for and I just pulled the book out again to get some advice on making naps a little easier. There is a whole section of suggestions. I don't think this is a cry it out book. She creates a middle ground between letting your baby cry and responding immediately. Although we didn't need to do the "Sleep Lady Shuffle" she suggests, so I can't comment on that. You will drive yourself crazy trying to find the "right" way to do things. Read what you can and do what feels right....more info
This book is pretty good as it details sleep issues for many different stages in a child's life BUT on the whole was a bit vague on the sections where I needed help. It didn't really go into the full specifics for trying to get our son to sleep through the night but I guess every baby is different. If you are trying to get help for your baby to sleep better then this book is certainly worth a read, but I am sure, like us, it probably won't be the only one you buy......................................sorry I dozed off there , sleep deprivation. ...more info
- Book outlines a humane, realistic sleep system that works for older children too
My child was two before my husband and I accepted that we weren't going to be able to successfully get her to sleep without help. We'd implemented both Ferber and The No Cry Sleep Solution and both worked for awhile, but she kept adjusting her wake-up patterns and we were desperate. Our pediatrician recommended The Sleep Lady, but before I called her I wanted a sense of her system, which the book gave me. It is a clear, informative volume on the science of sleep and why your baby wakes up, how you inadvertently reinforce those wakings and what you need to do to change it. If you are lucky and don't have a very resistant child, her system could change your life in ten days. If you are less lucky (and we were much less) it could take months, but we did see improvement right away. The approach is humane (you physically stay in the room with your child in the most difficult, cry-heavy phase, talking to them and telling them you are there) and it works, but be warned: it is not a three-day fix like Ferber promises. My sleep log shows three full months before the night wakings stopped completely -- and we still get them from time to time. Oh, and for those wondering if paying for the phone consult is worth it, it is. Kim West is truly a professional, and adds a lot of value relevant to your situation. But buy the book too, because you'll need to refer to it (I still do)....more info
- nothing GENTLE about it!
I originally read this book after hearing Kim West speak at a seminar while I was pregnant, and it made enough sense at the time. But now that I actually have my baby, I realize that this is nothing more than a spin on the cruel "cry it out" method and my baby is WAY TOO PRECIOUS to subject to this kind of treatment!
Besides that, I can't stand the way this "sleep" method creeps into all areas of parenting. She advocates a rather cold style that serves to make raising a baby convenient for the parents without much concern for what's actually best for a baby. What kills me is the way she makes it sound like you're doing your baby a favor or giving him a gift by adopting it. She calls nursing to sleep a "negative sleep association" which begs the question, is CRYING a POSITIVE sleep association?? I just don't see the logic.
Here is a sampling of the bad ideas she proposes:
*Schedule feeding. Any lactation consultant, LLL leader, or dietician will tell you that this is a BAD IDEA. And it leads to eating problems later in life, since it teaches your child to eat for reasons other than hunger. West calls herself a "lactation specialist" but after much searching, I cannot find any education or experience that would qualify her as such. You should be getting your advice from a CERTIFIED lactation consultant, not "the sleep lady" (who is by trader a social worker).
*The dramatic morning wake up. Burst into the room! Throw open the blinds! Speak loudly!...Would YOU want somebody to do that to you in the morning?? Do unto others...
*Crying is just a form of communication. According to the sleep lady, you need not feel bad about your baby crying. Why, then, I ask, does it feel SO WRONG? It feels wrong because crying is not just about communication -- it's your baby's way of telling you he's not ok. It is so cruel to ignore it -- you're teaching him that when he needs something, nobody cares. It has nothing to do with learning to sooth himself. And it is SO not the kind of "gift" I want to give my child.
Maybe this method helps make your child sleep better and longer. Maybe -- I don't know because I refuse to try. Everytime I pick up this book, it makes me more mad than the time before, as my attachment to my son grows. I much prefer Pantley's No Cry Sleep Solution....more info
- Interesting advice, but has some wrong info
I like how detail this book is with advices from birth to toddler. What I don't like about this book is how wrong it is on some information. The info on cosleeping is plain wrong. Cosleeping does not increase the chance of SIDS, it decreases the chance of SIDS. And many kids are shown to be more independent if they feel secure as an infant. It'll be a better book if the author has a better section on how to improve cosleeping family instead of advising people against cosleeping....more info
- Really works
I wish we would have had this book when our son was born. It shows us all the things we did wrong! It is a gentle, easy to read book. It is a well-balanced approach to coaching your kid how to sleep. Some of the simple things this book taught can make a world of difference in your child's behaviour. Even if your little one is not a baby anymore, this is still a good tool to use. Works well for toddlers. Our little 9 month girl sleeps 12 hours a night and has been doing so for months now. Sleep, sweet sleep!...more info
- amazing results
I read this book when my son was about 9months old and I was exhausted. It saved my life, or certainly my nighttime. Very helpful. It's not rocket science, but it helps to guide an exhauted and weary parent through allowing your child to figure out how to put him/herself to sleep. My son is now nearing 2 and I am still thankful everyday....more info
- great book, great advice
This is an excellent book, very well layed out and easy to understand techniques. I used it with my newborn and now she is 9 mos and still sleeping through the night without any problems. i can lay her down wide awake and she soothes herself to sleep. Even if you have older kids with sleep issues, the sleep lady explains what to do in each phase of your kids life. Try this! It works!!...more info
- Mixed results but sleeping much better!
My daughter was colicky for 3 months and very fussy after that until she was about 8 months. She had never slept well since birth. Sometimes she did not nap at all and cried all day. I read this book when my daughter was about 5 months old and tried it for naps without success. I shelved the book and forgot about it. I started cosleeping during the day and night and that really helped her fussiness a lot.
After my daughter was about 8 months old cosleeping was no longer a solution at night as she was waking quite often at night and impossible to put in her crib at all so we decided to try CIO (after reading Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child). We did it for 3 weeks and it was a disasterous failure. I was horrified and never expected it not to work. My daughter was just so strong willed and she would cry off and on all night. I gave finally up. I couldn't take it. She was becoming even more sleep deprived using this method and so was I. (Just a note - I'm not against CIO but unfortunately we are among the small percentage that it simply did not work for.)
After a few more sleepless weeks of cosleeping, I picked up this book again and gave it a try. There was crying involved but nowhere near with the Weissbluth method and my daughter started sleeping through the night. I was too exhausted to sit in a chair and go back and forth when my daughter woke all night so I slept in the position in her room gradually moving out of the room instead. Also, a very important detail for me ... Instead of leaving her to cry when she stood up as the book suggested, I would lie her down every 5-10 minutes. Otherwise, she would stand and cry for hours. This method took a month (as opposed to the 2 weeks the book says), but it worked! It was not easy and I had some very difficult nights particularly when I moved to the door and later out of sight, but I stuck with it and it gradually got better. Now, when I put my daughter in her crib she snuggles into her mattress and goes right to sleep. No tears! This method is the miracle we were desperate for!
Thank goodness for the Sleep Lady!...more info
- Not much help for younger babies
We bought this book when our daughter was four months old (and had it shipped overnight--we were getting desperate!). It wasn't very helpful, as it turns out. Her advice for babies this age essentially boils down to letting them cry it out, but staying in the room with them. Not particularly helpful, especially since our daughter was more hysterical when we stayed in the room with her than when we left her alone. We ended up doing more of a Ferber approach. No fun for anyone involved, but it worked.
When she was seven months old, we went on a trip, and her sleep schedule got all messed up. We got the book out again, and this time read the chapter on six- to seven-month-olds. This is the age where West introduces her Sleep Lady Shuffle. The idea is that you stay near their crib and "shh-shh-shh" at them, pat their back, whatever. It's a pretty good approach, and it seems to work for our older baby. So if you're looking for advice on how to get your six-month-old to sleep, you'll probably get some good information here. If your baby is three months old, get another book....more info
- Happy medium in the world of baby sleep
If you're searching for a sleep book, you're no doubt amazed by the range of advice. If you find "crying it out" too hard, and the "no-cry sleep solution" too soft, this method may be just right.
I did not read any "cry it out" books because it didn't feel completely right for us. I did read the "no-cry sleep solution," and though I am a fan of attachment parenting, this book recommended some things that we were trying to get away from (like the all-night pick up/put down dance). After reading that book, I felt like a terrible parent if I let her cry and if I wanted some peace at night.
The major theme of the Sleep Lady's book is that you have to teach your child how to sleep well. It made sense to me....you have to teach them how to do everything else! I will admit that some of the advice did sound pretty harsh to me (don't let your child think that throwing up will get him out of going to sleep), but it does have some good advice worth considering, such as creating a good sleep routine and environment, and being consistent. She also breaks it down into age categories which is very helpful, along with advice for all babies/children. This book is well written, clear and concise.
After only 9 days of following her advice, our 11 month old is doing beautifully! She stopped crying in the middle of the night within the first few nights, and though naps were a bit tougher, she is now starting to put herself to sleep. She has responded really well to the technique, and I'm glad we stuck it out through the tears because the payoff is worth it! She is sleeping well and waking up in a great mood.
I've decided that you really have to do some soul searching and lots of experimentation to figure out what is best for you and your baby. Good luck!...more info
- 2 under 2
I like the idea of this book but it is not workable with a 19 month old and a 5 month old. I can't take the time to sit with the 5 month old to let him get to sleep on his own while the other one is getting into everything that isn't and is strapped down. Maybe when the hubby has time off we can give it a try....more info
- It worked, and I'm so thankful
Everyone must make their own choice on how and where they'd like their baby to sleep at night. You need to choose if you wish to co-sleep or get your baby to sleep on their own.
This is a book you'll want to use if:
* If you want your child to sleep on their own, in their own crib, in their own room.
* If you're currently co-sleeping and want to transition your child to a crib.
You may get some good ideas, but this may not be the best choice if:
* You plan on continuing co-sleeping.
The book attempts to cover co-sleeping, but its more heavily focused on getting your baby to sleep on their own, teaching themselves to fall asleep, and staying asleep.
"The Sleep Lady" focuses on a method called the Sleep Lady Shuffle which in all honesty is a version of cry-it-out. The main difference between this and the typical "Ferber" method is that you stay in the room with your baby and gradually (over 2 weeks) move further and further away from the crib. Some people call this and any cry-it-out method "cruel", and for some children this won't work. You need to know your child, and know yourself. For me, by being in the room with her and shushing her to sleep, I knew she was safe and it was ok. And she knew I was there and it was ok. She'd lay herself down and fall asleep.
I started using this method when my daughter was 11 months old. I was co-sleeping with her and she'd wake up to nurse 2-3 times a night. If she'd wake up, I had to go into the room and lay down with her before she'd fall asleep, then quietly sneak out of the room. It worked, and I loved cuddling with her at night. But for me, it wasn't sustainable. Nap time was tough, she either had to be rocked to sleep or nursed to sleep, and if you jostled her too much while putting her into the crib - she'd be wide awake.
Less than 2 weeks after we started the Sleep Lady Shuffle, my daughter was able to put herself to sleep and sleep through the night (going to sleep at 7 and not waking again til 6). Naptime also got easier, and she now consistently naps 1 to 1 1/2 hours twice a day, and will fall asleep on her own.
She's teething now and she's doing great at night. I'm so proud of her. If you had told me a 6 weeks ago that she'd be sleeping on her own, all the way through the night, and could put herself to sleep, I would have called you a liar. But it's true, it's all happening. I'm so proud of her, and as silly as it sounds, I owe it to the Sleep Lady (and my friend who recommended it to me)....more info
- GREAT BOOK
There are no words to describe how valuable this book is! Our 10 month old had always been a fantastic sleeper but all of the sudden she started sleeping horribly. She wouldn't go down to sleep at night and once she did she got up during the night several times. Each time we would put her down we'd have to feed her at least one full sippy of milk, walk with her for at least 1/2 hr and then lie her down ever-so-quietly to prevent from jarring her awake. And sometimes those things didn't even work! At 13 months we finally decided enough was enough and we couldn't keep doing this. (Mostly because of how big and heavy she was getting!) So I checked Kim's book out of the library and within 3 nights she was MUCH better and within 5 nights she was falling asleep by herself and sleeping through the night. We didn't think we'd see those days again until she was 5 years old!! Needless to say, I'm buying this book as a gift for every baby shower I attend and it will be the first book I mention when someone tells me their child is a bad sleeper/napper. It has changed our lives! Thank you, Kim!!!!!!...more info
- Great book
Love this book. We had a terrible time getting our second daughter to sleep through the night. It got to the point where she would wake every hour and cry... until one of us held her to go to sleep. I read many sleep books, and this one seemed to click with us. After a few difficult nights of following suggestions from this book, she started sleeping through the night. It really seemed unbelievable at the time... we had been enduring the sleepless nights for several months... I would highly recommend this book to any expectant parent... wonderful advice laid out in a caring text....more info
I've been reading this book for some time now. Great tips, just need to learn to follow them! ...more info
- Simple, easy solution to sleeping issues
Very straightforward, very user-friendly (no confusing charts or hours of screaming). I felt more optimistic that my family will sleep better overall after using this guide versus the other remedies out there. It was a comfort reading other peoples' stories and seeing that this solution worked for them....more info
- Great Purchase and Quick Shipping
I received this book in great condition and received surprisingly quicker than when I was suppose to receive it. I would recomend this book to everyone with a new baby. This book has helped me so much with my 2yr old daughter.I have had this book since she was born. If you are having problems with your baby sleeping then try the sleep lady shuffle it works!!!...more info
- Great resource especially for new parents
My pediatrician recommened this book and I found it to be a great source of information and help. Not only does this book break out the amount of sleep a child needs at a particular age, but also gives step-by-step directions on how to help your child sleep. Sample schedules are enclosed and if your child doesn't follow the sample, a guideline is given so you can estimate the next sleep window. I used the "shuffle" when my child was 5 months old and he is a great sleeper today, at age 2. I still refer to this book and highly recommend it to all moms-to-be. ...more info
- SAVED OUR LIVES!!!
We got this book at the recommendation of our family doctor who had used West's methods with his own son. Our daughter was 6 mos and had never learned to sleep on her own. At 6 mos she was still waking EVERY hour until one of us would finally go in and hold her while we slept in her rocker. It was miserable. So, we implemented her method and within 2 weeks, she was sleeping 12 HOURS A NIGHT! I was AMAZED. I really thought it "wouldn't work with my strong-willed child". BUT IT DID.
Honesty time...it is tough the first few nights and you have to be prepared for some tears. But, if you stick to your guns and STAY CONSISTENT you will see much faster results. There is a message board on Kim West's website where moms share their experience with the program...and it always seems like the moms who bend the rules or break a little are always the ones who don't see results. I do recommend visiting that board for support while you are doing the program....it is a great network. The best part of her program is that you are right there with your little one the whole time (unlike "cry it out" which was WAY too painful for me to consider).
It's been 6 months since we did this and our daughter is a great sleeper. Even through sickness and teething, I see how it has helped her deal with her own night wakings without our intervention. GOOD LUCK and remember to STAY CONSISTENT!!!!...more info
- Saved my sanity
I loved this book. It absolutely saved my marriage and my sanity. My son 10 months old was waking up many times a night and within a week I saw a dramatic improvement in night time sleep. Within less than two weeks he was sleeping through the night with a 7pm bedtime. In two wks, he was taking regular naps with no fuss. He really did learn how to soothe himself to sleep without crying it out. We did not tolerate the ferber method. This book is the perfect alternative for low tear tolerance parents like my husband and myself. ...more info
- My favorite gift for new moms
Kim West has a proven, solid and most importantly, gentle method for helping babies and children develop and keep good sleep habits. If you missed the boat while your child was a baby, there are chapters for older toddlers and preschoolers. This book was so incredibly helpful with my first child that I followed it closely with my second. Both are very happy kids because they're so rested! Thanks Sleep Lady!!...more info
- AWFUL BOOK, AWFUL STRATEGY
Save yourself months of trouble and DON'T read this book. This strategy = waste of time, energy and lots of unnecessary tears. The idea is to quell your child's tears but after struggling with this theory I learned that tears for one or two nights without mom are far better than tears for weeks with mom in the room. HORRIBLE STRATEGY!!...more info
- Start your new family out right and truly enjoy your children!!!
I used this book with both my children; implementing the guidelines as soon as they were born. I cannot recommend it enough!!!! Our children thrived off the predictable routine and maximum sleep time. They were fantastic sleepers and still are. At ages 7 and 4 both children have been sleeping (in their own beds) from 8:30 P.M. till 8:00 A.M. without waking up since they were about 9 months old. I cannot tell you enough how great it is to have evenings to yourselves and happy children during the day. If you do exactly what is outlined in this book, you will have a success! I have recommended this book to many of my sleep deprived friends! I even acted as a sounding board to them when they wanted to cave and slip back into old habits. But because they too stuck with it, their children are now fantastic sleepers. Read this book!!!! Get your life back!!! ...more info
- This method works
I must admit that I was skeptical at first, but I am happy to say that Kim West's methods really work. I was very pleasently surprised. Our baby has gone from waking up a minimum of three to up to six times per night to now one waking at around 5AM. And I think there is still room for improvement on that as we are still in the middle of our "sleep training". I would encourage you to give the book and methods a try even if you are a skeptic like I was. Just be prepared for things to get worse for several nights before they get better... but it is well worth the sacrifice for a week in my mind.
It is also worth mentioning that our baby was not able to fall asleep unless she was feeding. The feeding calmed her down, which is natural, and eventually soothed her to sleep. This is the only way that she knew how to fall asleep. Now she can fall asleep on her own without having to be feeding to do so.
Good luck! ...more info
- Nothing gentle about this book
Do yourself a favor, and listen to your gut instead of what this book says. This book basically advocates crying it out for all ages. Her suggestions for soothing a baby are saying "sh-sh" and rubbing a baby's back. Well, that doesn't work when a baby is frantic and doesn't understand why you are ignoring her cries. After following some of the advice in this book for one night only, I feel I now have to work to regain the trust of my child. Yes, my child did not cry alone as in other methods, but there was still nothing gentle about it. Do what feels right to you as a parent. No book is going to have a magic answer for getting your family more sleep. ...more info
although we didn't need it, we ordered just in case, friends have used and highly recommend....more info
- GOOD NIGHT, SLEEP TIGHT
THIS IS WITHOUT A DOUBT THE BEST BOOK ON THE MARKET FOR NEW MOTHER'S. ALL THREE OF MY DAUGHTERS SWEAR BY IT, AND THEY ARE PHYSICIANS! I BUY IT FOR ALL OF MY FRIENDS WHO'S CHILDREN ARE EXPECTING. EVEN THE HUSBANDS LOVE IT!!
- Absolutely not recommended for breastfeeding mothers
This reviewer strongly cautions any parents who are committed to breastfeeding their newborns and young babies against taking the advice offered in this book. In the name of training extremely young babies to sleep through the night, Ms. West recommends a number of strategies that are in direct conflict with the recommendations made by certified lactation consultants. For example, Ms. West recommends introducing a bottle as early as two weeks, which is much earlier than most lactation consultants recommend (page 39). However, there are also other strategies that she recommends that are in direct conflict with established breastfeeding practices.
Most alarmingly, Ms. West writes that by the three months, babies should be fed no more than once between the 8pm and 6am feedings. She also suggests that -other than with small exceptions- babies should not be fed more than every three hours, and that babies at this age require five to six feedings per day (page 63-64). This is in direct conflict with accepted breastfeeding resource guidelines, which recommend eight to twelve feedings in a 24 hour period.
This review offers no evaluation on the efficacy of the author's strategies to induce appropriate sleep patterns in babies and young children. However, any parent who values the long and short term benefits of breastfeeding over the prospect of longer periods of sleep should seek other advice. ...more info
- It works! A wonderful technique
This book allows us to give our child the marvolous gift of learning to soothe themselves. The method WORKS! For those of you that judge the book after one night of crying...you are missing the wonderful results that come after 1 or 2 nights of crying...and 2 or 3 weeks of total training...THE RESULT IS many years of being able to fall asleep by themselves, soothe themselves, and stay asleep. With the Sleep Lady's method my son cried the first couple of days, yes, but even though it was hard to hear I knew that by being with him in the room I was making sure he was fine and the crying was just a period of adjustment. I taught my son with this method when he was 8 months old, after only 2 nights of some crying, and 2 weeks of staying up in his crib for maybe an 1 hr (without crying) while I was still in the room, self-learning a soothing technique (I did use pacifiers at first)...HE DID IT, he learn to go to sleep by himself and to this day (he is 4 years old) he has sleept for 10-11 hrs straight every single night of his life!!!! Even when he is sick and might awaken for a few moments, or have to be waken up for medicine, I can just after kissing him goodnight turn around and leave the room and peacefully from my baby monitor witness that he can fall asleep all by himself again. It's a great feeling and I owe it to the Sleep Lady Shuffle! I'm sure my little one thanks me for that :-)...more info
- This book is worth it for tired parents
First, this book includes lots of tips for babies any age, and includes sections specific to certain age groups. For each age group, it lists suggested feeding/sleeping schedules, typical sleep requirements, and sleep methods to try. Before 6 months, the methods basically include putting your baby down awake but sleepy, and not leaving her side at all. After 6 months, the methods focus mostly on her Sleep Lady Shuffle. The shuffle is a way to get your baby to sleep on his own, while you move further and further away from his bed every few days. I can't say that I used this book exactly as it is suggested, but we modified it and things have worked out great. But when my son was 6 months, we used the suggestion of putting him down at night awake but sleepy, and staying with him until he went to sleep on his own. He had a hard time with it at first, and he was a big screamer, and I continued to nurse him when he woke up in the middle of the night, but he started going to sleep very easily every night after about a week. Once he started doing that, he soon stopped waking up so much in the middle of the night. Now he goes to sleep between 7 pm - 7:30 pm, wakes between 10 pm - 11 pm to nurse, then sleeps to anywhere between 6 am - 7 am. We never even had to move to the part of the sleep lady shuffle where you move further and further away from the crib....more info
- Best Book Ever!
This book literally saved my sanity. My son was co-sleeping and practically nursing all night long. Not to mention naps were very difficult. I wasn't getting any sleep until I found this book. I'm a firm believer that every child is unique and you have to do what's right for you so I was able to adjust the method to work for me and my son. It worked miracles. Within a week my son was sleeping through the night in his own crib. After I had my second son I used this book as well. It has helped me so much. Now I am a much happier mommy with much happier babies:)...more info
- "Cry it out" in Disguise
We thought this book was a "kinder-gentler" way to help our 4-month old son learn how to sooth himself back to sleep rather than letting him "cry it out". Unfortunately, this is really that same formula in a different format. The author suggests you put your kid down "drowsy but awake" so that he or she can then sooth themselves. The problem is, if your kid is like ours, drowsy means that he wakes up and starts to cry. You are then allowed to comfort your child by shushing and with gentle pats, etc. while you sit next to the crib. Our son just escalated the crying and worked himself up to the point it took us another hour to get him to sleep. It's not really any different than crying-it-out except that you are sitting right there while you child stares at you and cries. What never made sense to us was how your child will suddenly figure out how to self-sooth in the midst of his or her frantic crying and your attempts at soothing. We put the book away and are back to rocking him to sleep before putting him in his crib. ...more info
- Good book (even for co-sleepers!)
I co-slept with my baby from birth through age 26 months. She slept in our family bed every night, and nursed as well until I weaned her at 22 months.
When I was expecting my next baby, I wondered if it was possible to transition her to her own bed in her own room without trauma. I had read The No Cry Sleep Solution and had managed to night wean her.... but the task of getting her to sleep alone (even just for naps) seemed impossible.
I was wrong. With the "Sleep Lady Shuffle," my child miraculously went from only sleeping with me (even for naps) to sleeping in her own room with minimal tears.
After three weeks of using the "Sleep Lady Shuffle," my daughter goes to sleep alone for both naps and at night in under five minutes (no "crying it out" involved!) and sleeps through the night for 11 hours. If she wakes once or twice (she sometimes does), she puts herself back to sleep after I remind her it's still night time and to go back to sleep.
This was a child who ONLY slept with me next to her in the family bed, and I was lucky to get 45 minutes of napping daily. Now she sleeps a solid two hours during her afternoon nap and we ALL get to sleep all night.
I don't imagine this book will work for everyone every time, and I DID find myself frustrated at the author's generally negative view of co-sleeping, but I am very pleased with our results using her method.
I would not change the two years of co-sleeping, and we plan to do it again with the next baby. But after two years of the family bed, we are very happy to have a method that works to get a toddler sleeping on her own with no "cry-it-out" and minimal fussing and crying.
Overall, a good book with a simple, clear plan....more info
- Life Saver!
I love the gentle approach this book has to training your child to sleep throught the night. The book warned that there would be crying involved-and there was, but my husband and I only did what was comfortable for both of us, and after the 2nd night, our little girl caught on and has been sleeping through the night since. We started this book when she was 3 months old and now she is 1 yr and 8 mo. This book has saved our sanity and also contributed to the security of our daughter!...more info
- Awsome - Gentle - Worked for both my kids
I found out about her methods when my son was 9-12 months and a horibble sleeper, crying for an hour or more when put to bed, sleeping only 30 minutes for morning nap, and if I could get him to sleep while holding I had to hold him the whole 2 hours - AHHHHH! She didn't have this book available at the time, but we purchased her guidline booklet and took a phone class she offered. Within a very short time we stopped night time feeding and were sleeping through the night and going down for naps without a fuss and sleeping well. He's 3 and still a great sleeper. What a blessing.
We bought this book for my daughter before she was born, and she has been a wonderful sleeper, sleeping 8 hours through the night by 10-12 weeks. What a blessing sleep is! I highly recommend her book as well as her phone classes if you need more....more info
- 5 stars for a good night's sleep!
My husband and I did the "sleep lady shuffle" with our daughter when she was 6 months old. She was sleeping through the night within a week or two and has been ever since (she is 13 months now). The method didn't work as quickly for naptime, but it got us into a specific routine and after a few months of doing the same thing my daughter now falls asleep easily and takes two 2-hour naps each day - YAY! I can't stress enough how important it is to have everyone involved w/ sleeptime read the pertinent chapters so every knows how to handle the sleep training. Without my husband and I on the same page it would have been MUCH more difficult....more info
- CIO method in disguise
This book is nothing more than the "cry it out" method in disguise, so unless you agree with that particular parenting philosophy, this isn't the book for you....more info
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